''I do not understand why young players write books. I do not know why a player at 25 wants to tell me all about his big experiences.

''When I consider the age I am now, I would have a lot to tell people. But it seems to be an English habit to come out with books that nobody needs,'' so said Arsenal keeper Jens Lehmann when quizzed about the merits of Ashley Cole's much-maligned efforts.

At the other end of the scale comes Keith Houchen. Unlike Cole, he never had the chance to turn down £50,000 a week.

Instead he played over 500 professional games, scored one of the greatest goals in FA Cup history, managed Hartlepool United at a time when Sir Alex Ferguson would have struggled to turn things around and now, after almost ten years out of the game, has put together A Tenner and a Box of Kippers, The Story of Keith Houchen.

A tale to tell? Certainly.

From his inaugural days at the old Victoria Ground, signed by Billy Horner from Nunthorpe Athletic in February 1978, to his sad departure as manager in November 1997, it's a book North-East football fans can relate to; it's a million miles away from the Footballers Wives lifestyles of Cole, Ferdinand and Co.

On Bob Newton, Pools striker: "He was the local favourite, a beast of a man with a bull neck, massive barrel chest and thighs as big as my torso, with a temper to match.''

On Billy Ayre: "He was the toughest bloke I'd ever seen. He used to out-tough sides just by staring at them.''

With Houchen making a name for himself, Pools were hoping for something like £300,000 from the sale of their promising striker, chairman Vince Barker claiming Sunderland spent more on Ally McCoist -a front man not in the same league as his player.

Liverpool boss Bob Paisley was keen and watched the striker in action. He decided instead of signing a promising Hartlepool United striker to sign a promising Chester City striker. He was called Ian Rush.

Houchen then moved to Leyton Orient for £25,000, a knock-down fee which kept the VAT man from the door and kept Pools in business.

From Brisbane Road to York City, where his last-gasp penalty dumped Arsenal out of the FA Cup, and onto Scunthorpe, for £40,000 in March 1986.

He's put the mileage in, but it wasn't long before Houchen would become synonymous with the FA Cup. And just like Ronnie Radford if guaranteed to pop up on third round day, so Houchen's 1987 diving header against Spurs will be shown come May.

"I could honestly say to you that I was consciously thinking that if the ball comes in I can dive and head it. It all finishes up as perfect timing - but in a lot of ways it's a fluke.

"All this isn't supposed to happen to a ragamuffin like me.''

That was, undoubtedly, the pinnacle. From then it was to Hibs, Port Vale and, full circle, back to Pools.

How Houchen would have loved the chance to manage the club in the circumstances recent managers - from Chris Turner to Danny Wilson - have enjoyed.

The club was barely out of a CVA when he took over from David McCreery. It's now when the book gets interesting.

His passion and desire to lift Pools up the tables saw him clash with referees, players and the local newspaper, The Hartlepool Mail.

After releasing home-grown left back Antony Skedd - "tiny little thing, bonehead, skinhead, earrings, tattoos, couldn't talk without swearing, couldn't play'' - Houchen received letters at the club addressed to "Adolf Houchen".

Portly goalkeeper Brian Horne was another who Houchen couldn't understand - "He was an absolute slob.''.

The manager had lifted Pools into the top half of the table, quite an achievement at the time. But he found himself on the wrong end of endless refereeing decisions.

"There's a bit of blatant cheating going on. It's as if the officials have had a meeting and said 'Hartlepool are in the top ten, we'll have to do something about it.' he claimed.

After banging his head against the proverbial brick wall, Houchen left after a pitiful 3-2 home defeat to Brighton. "The whole ground was singing Houchen Out. I was standing behind the dug out thinking 'I don't need this'.

Since that day he hasn't been back. Houchen is now involved in providing statistics to the Press Association, coaching youngsters for Middlesbrough and in local schools.

Few managers leave Pools and move onto better things and Houchen deserved to leave in better circumstances than he did. The passion and frustration which came with managing Pools is apparent throughout the book. This story is one of real life football.

l A Tenner and a Box of Kippers by Jonathan Strange, published by Tempus, available now priced £14.99. www.tempus-publishing.com