An old farmhouse has taken on a new lease of life - thanks to two men who felt they needed a real challenge.
THOUGH perhaps not as famous as the Two Ronnies, West Auckland used to have two Berts, both wonderful characters who could be every bit as funny. Bert Mangles had the Queens Head in the 1970s, was headmaster of its three card brag school and used to cut hair - five bob, snip - in the workmen's club next door. Bert's tonsure was admittedly open to censure; he kept a much better pint of Gold Tankard.
Around the same time, Bert Walton ran the Wheatside Hotel. Originally a B&B and transport cafe, it had from time to time been extended by Bert - usually, memory suggests, to the considerable chagrin of the local planning authority whose gracious consent appeared inadvertently to have been overlooked.
Built as a farmhouse in 1890, the Wheatside was almost atop Bildershaw Bank, on the A68 heading south out of the village and with wonderful views across the Wear valley.
Told he was going to become a father at much the same time as he was due to collect his first old-age pension, a delighted Bert declared that the child would be called Osram. The reasons may best be left to the imagination.
Now the Wheatside has new owners and a new name, The Otter, is undergoing a major refurbishment and operating as pub, bistro and country hotel.
On a clear day, which it wasn't, the views are as spectacular as ever.
David Oliver has worked at Lumley Castle, Ramside Hall and for Swallow Hotels at the Eden Arms, Rushyford and elsewhere. John Murphy, his partner, was - still is - a hairdresser in Sacriston, north of Durham. "We were looking for somewhere that needed building up, somewhere with rooms that would provide a challenge" says David. They've been there since January 1 and it certainly looked challenging. The first week they took £3.65, a penny for every day of the year.
It's not that David's unfriendly, far from it, but that the other one is welcoming and talkative - salon skills - from the moment of arrival. "I used to be very quiet until I became a hairdresser, " he insists.
It was Sunday lunchtime, a group of enthusiasts gathered outside to watch and to photograph a rake of vintage lorries ambling elegantly up the hill and to rebuke one another for not knowing the difference between a Leyland and a Scammell.
It's easy: a Scammell has two humps.
(Or is that a dromedary? ) The bar, unfinished, is already uncommonly comfortable, lots of deep sofas.
The bar has a couple of pot otters and a disappointing range of keg-only beers; the charming barmaid deserving something better. They were given the Eating Owt cask ale lecture, rough with the Smooth, and have promised quite soon to get real.
There's also a new verandah, finally installed a few days beforehand. "You wait 20 weeks and then you can hardly see to the bottom of the bank, " said John.
NOT having booked, we were seated in something pretty akin to a corridor. A wholly inexpensive specials board nearby offered dishes like medallions of beef with king prawns and oysters (£10.95), pigeon and pheasant with a woodland berry sauce (£9.45) and chicken breast stuffed with banana and wrapped in parma ham for just £8.25.
Sunday lunch is £6.95 for one course, £8.95 for two and £9.95 the set. Accompanying music is middle of the road, Radio 2 can play.
The conversation turned to Tarka the Otter and, in vain, to trying to remember the only known Tarka joke. The punchline's something about it being a little otter; someone may remember.
She began with egg mayonnaise with a pleasant salad, we with crisp black pudding in a lively green peppercorn sauce. No side plates.
Plenteous pork followed with a fresh Yorkshire pudding and equally abundant vegetables. Fower taties more than a gis, as we Durham lads might say in such circumstances. She had the seared salmon; thought it good value.
Best of all was the ginger sponge, made by John's mum - who also did the attractive interior design for much of the upstairs reincarnation - and effectively only £1, with strawberries and custard.
Four months after taking £3.65 in a week, they'd just had two nights with all 12 rooms fully booked. As probably they say if the cloud ever lifts, well worth a look.
The Otter Hotel, Bildershaw Bank, West Auckland, Co Durham (01388 832725). Weekday lunch from £4.50, meals served every day except Sunday evening. There's also a smart, 12-seat private dining room.
Comments: Our rules
We want our comments to be a lively and valuable part of our community - a place where readers can debate and engage with the most important local issues. The ability to comment on our stories is a privilege, not a right, however, and that privilege may be withdrawn if it is abused or misused.
Please report any comments that break our rules.
Read the rules hereComments are closed on this article