Now in its 30th year, the Tyneside Rape Crisis Centre has helped thousands of women recover from rape and sexual violence. Sarah Foster pays a visit.

A WOMAN sits quietly in the waiting room. She is a survivor of sexual violence.

That is the reason she is here, and yet on meeting her, you forget this. She wears a suit – hardly a victim’s attire – and is slim and attractive. When she speaks, she is both open and articulate; the kind of woman who seems at ease in any company. Yet she has suffered indescribably and when, at last, she tells her story, it causes silence.

The woman in question, who’s 32 and who assumes the name of “Lisa”, is at the Tyneside Rape Crisis Centre, based near the station in Newcastle.

For 30 years, it’s been a lifeline for local women, providing counselling and help for survivors of rape and sexual violence. It’s no mean feat that it has lasted – in the past 20 years, the number of centres of its kind in England and Wales has nearly halved – and now it’s the longest continuous running rape crisis centre in the country.

Set up by women, it is a feminist organisation and it is also a collective, so no one person is in charge. Its erudite spokeswoman is Dawn Bowman, who explains what it’s about.

“The centre is for women who are 16-plus who have survived sexual violence at any point in their lives. We are a women-only service – we guarantee women who come for counselling that it’s a women-only space – and the women who come here find it easier to come because of that.

“We know that men do experience sexual violence as well, and we do refer them to the appropriate agencies where they can access support.”

The idea of men not being admitted may at first appear a little extreme, but as Dawn explains, these are vulnerable women who have been targeted by males. Arriving for counselling, they are particularly raw, and even the innocent smell of aftershave can trigger flashbacks of their abuse.

So what exactly is sexual violence?

Dawn has a straightforward definition.

“Sexual violence can be anything from rape to verbal sexual abuse if it stays with the woman and she feels like she needs support.”

As a first port of call, women are encouraged to ring the centre’s helpline, which runs two evenings a week and is staffed by trained volunteers. They can speak in confidence – vital for those who’ve experienced sexual abuse – and know they’ll be listened to without judgement. If the woman wants it, she can access face-to-face counselling at the centre, although at the moment, there’s a waiting list.

“We do have a waiting list, however, I would not discourage women from calling if they needed support, especially to use our phone line service,”

says Dawn. “We really want to focus on the helpline because that’s often the best way for women to get in touch. I think what women find useful with the helpline is that they are in control of the situation – they can end the call at any time and they can give as much information as they want to.”

A brief tour of the centre reveals two tranquil rooms – one for each of the counsellors – where women go to discuss their problems. They have been made as homely as possible, with comfy chairs and various props.

Some of these, like the assortment of stones, can be used as part of therapy, and a spare chair is sometimes called upon for role-play. The key thing is, the woman decides. “Our counsellors are person-centred, so it’s very much about the woman leading the conversation,” explains Dawn.

THIS notion of the woman in control extends to the issue of pressing charges. A staggering 90 per cent of women never pursue this as an option and the shockingly low percentage of convictions – a paltry 5.7 per cent in cases involving sexual violence – could be a major reason why. The centre would love to see this change and, as part of a wider Rape Crisis network, is working with the Government to make reforms, but while the current climate exists its main priority is the victims.

“We never broach the subject of reporting to the police – that’s always the woman’s choice,” says Dawn. “If a woman brought it up, then the counsellor would explore it with her.

“That goes for the helpline as well.

Sexual violence happens in many different scenarios, so the reasons why that woman may not want to report can be different from woman to woman. One of the reasons could be society’s perception of survivors of sexual violence and what it means to go public.”

The centre recognises that the victim’s pain may go on for years after the abuse has ended, so supports, for example, many adults who suffered as children. It also helps those with learning disabilities, who unsurprisingly, are statistically more likely to be targeted.

A new report by the Fawcett Society suggests that places like the Tyneside Rape Crisis Centre are badly needed. It states that one in four women in England and Wales suffer sexual assault in their lifetime, and with support services dwindling as prosecution rates remain low, the demand for specialist centres is on the increase.

SOMEONE who knows only too well how important they are is Lisa. From the age of 14 to 22 she was raped and sexually abused by a family member. Such was the extent of the trauma this caused that swathes of her memory have been erased – she can’t recall people she went to school with or sitting the finals for her degree. Things came to a head when, about four years ago, she revealed the secret of her abuse.

It was blighting her life and the burden was proving too much to bear.

The disclosure was explosive, sending shockwaves through Lisa’s family and making her wish she had never spoken out, and at her lowest point, she was suicidal. Then she found the courage to call the helpline.

“I can remember my first time ringing – I didn’t say anything for the first 30 minutes, just cried,” she says. “The woman said it was all right. She didn’t ask me any questions, she didn’t go into any great detail and she was very professional and very open.”

Lisa subsequently went for face-toface counselling, visiting the centre weekly for a while and later returning for a “sanity check”. It wasn’t easy – she sometimes dreaded going for sessions – but in the end, she banished her demons. She is here today, relieving the pain she would rather forget, to give something back. “The last two-and-a-half years have probably been the best of my whole life,”

she says. “I have vivid memories and true relationships and that’s through coming here. Now I have a future, which I never dreamed I would ever have.”

■ The Tyneside Rape Crisis Centre helpline is open on Tuesdays and Thursdays, 6pm to 8.30pm, on 0191-232-9858. Those in County Durham or Darlington can ring 01325-369933 from Monday to Thursday, 6.30pm to 9pm.