Fat chance

Eddie Fung, a Belfast-based entrepreneur, proposed to open a £1.3m restaurant in the new and boisterous Walkergate development, opposite the Gala Theatre. Like one of his Belfast restaurants, it was to be called Fat Buddha.

The name upset Tracey Inglis, the city council's head of cultural services, who claimed it was "provocative" and demanded he change it.

"To use the name of a major religious deity in your restaurant brand runs contrary to this city's reputation as a place of equality and respect for others' views and religious beliefs," she added, somewhat piously.

The story received nationwide press and television attention, not least because Eddie Fung is himself a Buddhist, because the Buddhist Society confirmed that rubbing the fat Buddha's tummy is regarded as lucky and in no way objectionable and because Ms Inglis appeared to be talking out of her swivel chair.

It's possible, of course, that it was a wonderful public relations wheeze to promote a new business, in which case the lady deserves a pay rise toot sweet.

Conversely she might simply have failed to do her homework, in which case there's only one silly Buddha and it's not Eddie Fung. Had she objected to menu guff like "Worship at the food and drink altar of Fat Buddha," she might have had a point.

We arrived, unbooked, at 6pm on Saturday evening, a week after opening. Officially it's Unit 6, which for children of the 60s may recall Unit Four+2 who had a big hit with Concrete and Clay. It could have been written for Walkergate.

Eddie himself was on the reception desk and with infinite courtesy - "Do please consider us again" - turning telephone bookings away.

They found us a table - "Please may we have it back by 8pm," said Eddie - at the top of the stairs, near a little tier of identically gleeful Buddhas. Perhaps they'd been reading the papers.

Like the flying ants at the match earlier in the day, the Buddhas appeared everywhere. That's enough Buddha puns, too, lest the city council become upset.

Eddie, wholly charming, still lives in Belfast but thought himself a bit of a gipsy. There are images of his children on the restaurant windows to help remind him what they look like.

The menu also announces that Fat Buddha "aims to completely cleanse the body and mind in order to return them to the original state of clarity and purity".

In Belfast that might be called blarney, in Durham it's more likely to be called cobblers - but it's a fabulously designed place, for all that.

Outside it's modishly described as a "bar/kitchen", the ground floor bar lined with a job lot of books from Durham County library. There's a fish pool, sumptuous seating, interest everywhere.

Upstairs so greatly defies description that it's to be hoped the photographer was on form. "We call it the wow factor," said Eddie and, to be honest, well they might.

There are all manner of nooks and crannies, a central, ingeniously designed "catwalk", cosmopolitan, attentive if understandably slightly green staff.

Eddie begins an itinerary - "China, Malaysia, Sunderland" - and there is indeed a bonny lass with an accent as broad as Houghton Cut.

An oriental waitress takes the drinks order, an elderflower bellini (£4.95) and a pint. She calls the beer Jim Smith's Smooth, though it's been called worse (and not least around here.)

The menu - "Accept nothing that is not pure and perfect. Let your senses be fulfilled, let your body be awakened" - is what they call Asian fusion, which in this case means sub-sections from China, Hong Kong, Thailand, Japan, Malaya and Korea. There are "Asian tapas", too.

The Boss started with tempura vegetables (£5.80). Doubtless pure, they were average at best. The "Shanghai chicken scallion dumplings" were altogether better executed and very tasty. "Scallion" is by no means a North-East word, as often is supposed. Chambers defines it as "a leek with a defective bulb".

She followed with stir-fried chicken fillet with fresh ginger sauce, we with stir-fried shredded duck with Korean-style kimchi - fermented vegetables, Korea's national dish. All perfectly good, but neither as adventurous nor as eyecatching as the surroundings.

Somewhat curiously, the menu said the "home made" sponge pudding was "worth trying" and thus got it wrong. It was lifeless. The Thai bananas were a much better bet.

Downstairs, Eddie and his people continued with impeccable courtesy to turn potential customers away. The night was young and they'd booked another 180. That Friar Tuck of a Buddha is laughing all the way to the bank.

The Fat Buddha, Unit 6, Walkergate, Durham. Open all day - and clearly best to book. 0191-383-1390.

STILL in Durham, still veering east, a reader in Darlington reports a curious case of big and little helpings at In Shanghai, a Chinese buffet restaurant beneath the Gates shopping centre.

She'd gone for lunch with two 11-year-old boys, enjoyed the meal, admired the range.

When the bill came, however, the manager said both boys should be charged as adults - because they were over 4ft 11in tall - but that he'd let one off.

Only our reader felt small. "I've heard of restaurants going by age but never by height. I've never heard of anything so ridiculous in my life. I won't be going back."

A LONG promised treat, we have finally been for a penny duck - otherwise, a faggot - at Robinson's in Wingate, east Durham.

Winner of the "traditional business" section in the Countryside Alliance's rural retailer awards, the butcher's and next door cafà sources almost everything locally and even kills its meat in the abattoir out the back. "A proper shop selling proper food produced the proper way," wrote the lady of this house back in March.

It's cheerily run by Trevor Robinson and Janet Bell, his sister, the fifth generation since the family business began in 1874.

Lunch seemed a good idea, too. Mince and dumplings, the day's special, £3. "The food will be fine, it's the staff you have to worry about," said Trevor. The staff were smashing, of course, and so were the mince and dumplings - exactly like mother used to make.

The gravy was mopped up with this great, glorious and utterly succulent duck. A duck's seven bob these days, but still worth every penny.

REPORTING an as-ever pleasant pint at the Ship Inn at Middlestone, near Bishop Auckland, last week's column noted that one of the ales was called Maggie's End, from the Jarrow Brewery, and that it had been brewed to promote a play.

Unfortunately we'd lost the leaflet: the drink to blame, probably.

Tyneside playwright Ed Waugh now reports that the comedy's the work of him and Trevor Wood - they who combined on Waiting for Gateaux and Dirty Dusting - and that its starting point is the death of Margaret Thatcher.

Its premiere run is for five nights from October 16 at the Gala Theatre in Durham. There's a restaurant called Fat Buddha just across the way.

...and finally, the bairns wondered if we knew what's pink, sugary, and swings from cake to cake.

Tarzipan, of course.