THERE was blood and thunder at this week’s Labour party conference – but, sadly, it was seen on the football pitch, not in the conference centre.

I briefly found myself making the news, not writing it, when a tender spot on my face foolishly ran into the meaty forearm of Ed Balls, the Shadow Chancellor.

The bruise is changing from deep purple to glowing yellow and the stitches come out tomorrow, thanks for asking – no permanent harm done.

But what a shame a little of the passion and will to win displayed by Mr Balls at the Etihad Campus on Sunday didn’t translate to the conference itself, which was deadly, deadly dull.

Senior Labour figures – who hope to be Cabinet ministers in eight months’ time – sent delegates to sleep with their speeches and interesting debate appeared to be banned from the fringe.

The tedium was epitomised by Ed Miliband’s speech which was, for those of us forced to listen throughout, almost as painful as a trip to A&E at Manchester Royal Infirmary.

In past years, the Labour leader has delivered on his big day, changing the political weather with his attack on ruthless capitalism, devotion to ‘One Nation’ and the energy price freeze.

But, this time, Mr Miliband flopped, failing to inject energy or provide inspiration, while pledging a “principle” – ‘Together’ – too bland to have any real bite.

Worse, he forgot to include passages on the key issues of the budget deficit and immigration – a gift for opponents who want to ram home the message that he can’t be trusted on either.

Neither the speech nor the conference were a disaster. In setting out a new funding package for the NHS, Mr Miliband ensured the health service will be an election headache for the Tories.

A ‘mansion tax’ is hugely popular outside London – and David Cameron vetoed one (said his biographer) because “our donors would never put up with it”. Ouch.

There are reasons for Labour’s lacklustre performance, with both leader and followers worn out by the Scottish referendum.

And any party would struggle to grab the public’s attention, squeezing in a conference between the near-heart attack of Scotland and the RAF’s arrival over the skies of northern Iraq.

Nevertheless, the near-universal view is that Labour failed to find the back of the net, in front of a big crowd, in a key fixture, in a career-defining season.

Going into his speech, Mr Miliband’s personal ratings were relegation-threatening – languishing way below his opponent on competence, intelligence and ability to get things done.

Some in Manchester can remember Tony Blair’s pre-election conference speech, back in 1996, when the party fizzed with excitement and confidence about the victory to come. Almost two decades later, the mood could not be more different – a nervousness that it could all go horribly wrong before May and that, even if victory comes, Labour is not ready for it.

With eight months to go, the conference was a great opportunity to land some telling blows – but the most effective was the one that sent me to hospital.