It's the time of year to pay tribute to all the people who, week in and week out, put themselves out to help others. The don't always get a mention, so the Shoptalk column presents Bouquets of the Year to show that their good work is not taken for granted.

IN THE chaos of the Christmas shops and New Year sales, we have all done it - turned around to speak to the person we are shopping with only to find they're not there. Usually it just means back-tracking a few paces or even calling them on the mobile.

But for Eunice Bell, losing her husband Peter during Durham's Christmas shopping festival was a much more serious matter. "Total panic set in," she admits. "I was absolutely beside myself."

Four years ago Peter suffered a severe brain haemorrhage. After surgery to remove an aneurism, he spent ten months in hospital. He was forced to give up work, his car and life as he and his family knew it. He is not the man he was.

"When he goes into a shop and sees something, it's as if he goes into another world. And he gets lost a lot, which is why I was panic-stricken this time," recalls Eunice.

Peter, a busy father and grandfather with a job as a representative for a medical equipment company, was in a hotel in Northern Ireland in August 2002 when it became clear the headaches and sleepiness he had been suffering from were something much more serious.

Ironically, Eunice was a senior nurse for neuro rehabilitation at Hunters Moor hospital in Newcastle.

"He phoned me from the hotel and I knew he was having a cerebral bleed. He said he felt very sick, was in excruciating pain, he was sweating, he couldn't stand up and was on the verge of passing out," she recalls.

As Peter was taken to hospital, Eunice flew to Belfast. She knew the prospects weren't good.

"As used as I was to people with brain injury, when it's your own husband lying there it's awful. He was swollen from the top of his head to half way down his chest. We weren't given any guarantees for two weeks and every day we were thankful.

"In the beginning all you want is for them to live. You cling on to the fact that they're still alive. Then you think 'please let them walk', then 'please let them speak'. Then you get to the stage where you realise this is it, they're not going any further."

Peter was transferred to Newcastle General Hospital and would then have been sent home to Durham but Eunice fought to get him into Prudhoe hospital, a specialist centre which focuses on the behavioural recovery of patients with brain injury. In another irony, Peter had been a regular visitor to the hospital through his work.

"I had visited there so I knew how good they were, but anyone without my experience of services in the region wouldn't have known that," says Eunice.

She is now retired but, as she says, it's not the retirement she had looked forward to for herself and Peter. "He has an atrocious memory that's getting worse. All day I have to keep reminding him what day it is, where he's been or where we're going. He has no sense of time, so we can't plan. He goes to the gym but has to go by taxi because he can't get the bus routes sorted out in his mind. When he goes to day care, they pick him up and bring him back.

"He mixes events up when he's telling you things, then will argue when you say it's not right. With some things, you can let it go, but when it's a serious matter you worry in case he's telling other people the same things.

"His tolerance levels are much lower too. He has lost some self-confidence. He doesn't sleep through the night so gets very fatigued during the day. He has put on a lot of weight and now has type two diabetes."

While no one was to blame for Peter's so-called acquired brain injury, the effects on his loved ones' lives are no less devastating. But Eunice worries for families with no experience of brain injuries. Even she has felt compelled to draw on the help of social worker Des O'Meara, who is now working with North-East law firm Blackett Hart & Pratt to support patients and their families through the difficult post-injury times.

"For example, we claimed for disability living allowance, which I've helped many others do before. I didn't think we were awarded enough so we appealed and with Des's help went to tribunal and were awarded much more," says Eunice.

"With every other round of professional people Peter has to see, I have to go too to answer the questions - he can't do it on his own. To have an advocate like Des who can help you through it is fantastic. He is very knowledgeable and has masses of experience in this area. I don't contact him that often but I know he's there to talk to or to come out and see us."

Eunice adds: "People who find themselves in this situation out of the blue need help. At the moment you have to push for everything and you can't always do that on your own.

"There are all sorts of forms to fill in. There are boxes to tick for physical, mental and learning disabilities but cognitive disability is never mentioned. If you're physically disabled it's obvious, but people with cognitive problems are just ignored."