Do you take this debt?

EVERY cloud… the good news about bad times is that weddings are becoming less extravagant. Couples already struggling to buy a house, and parents who’ve seen their pensions plummeting, are beginning to think there are better things on which to spend £21,000, the cost of the average wedding.

Expensive wedding venues are suffering a drop in bookings. But, more importantly, say wedding planners, there are signs of a change in attitude, which could save us all a small fortune.

When times are so hard for so many, an over-the-top wedding seems in questionable taste. Positively vulgar, my dear.

So small-scale – ie cheap – is so much more classy. What a relief.

Instead of being caught up in the whole wedding day package – doves, favours, make-up rehearsals, quartets and more flowers than at Chelsea Flower Show – couples are actually beginning to think about what they really want.

What’s more, the big thing now is to make it much more personal – which could mean your mum doing the flowers, granny making the cake and your dad sorting out the invitations on the computer. Who needs elaborate floral decorations when the hedgerows are full of cow parsley to make a lovely frothy background?

More people are planning very simple weddings abroad as part of a holiday. Even if they also have the big family party back home, it’s just that – a party. No need for horse and carriage or for the sugared almonds to co-ordinate with the rose petals and bridesmaids’ dresses. No pressure, no panic, just a happy occasion, which, after all, is what it’s meant to be.

An extravagant wedding is no guarantee of future happiness. Quite the opposite really. Debt is never great for a relationship. It’s not the wedding that’s important, it’s the marriage.

Cling on to that thought – it could save you a fortune.

MANY years ago, when first-class travel really was first class, I finally clawed my way up to the appropriate level in the BBC to be entitled to such luxury. I enjoyed it for just one glorious journey from Birmingham to London (the coffee! the comfort! the deferential steward!) before the BBC went through one of its occasional puritanical phases – it was a long time ago – and changed the rules.

People earning such high salaries could afford to pay the first-class supplement themselves, they said. The corporation would reimburse only the standard fare. If you wanted to travel first, you could pay for it yourself.

Great.

It eventually changed back again – just months after I left, of course.

But I still approve really. It has a splendid, simple, democratic logic about it.

Time to reintroduce it in the BBC, government and any organisation that is funded by public money.

Not just for the money it would save but, equally importantly, for a sense of fair play.

LAST week Lisa Duncan of Darlington emailed in with her family’s story that her mother’s wedding trousseau in 1944 was made from parachute silk – probably through her Uncle Bill who was in the RAF. “Was this really likely?” she asked?

Definitely.

Angela Smith was born in 1944 and her godfather served in the parachute regiment. No surprise then that her Christening gown was made of parachute silk.

Peggy Robertson remembers parachute silk being prized. “In wartime when everything was rationed, a bundle of parachute silk was a real bonus.

“My sisters and I all had lovely French knickers which we made from a length of parachute silk that my father acquired (no questions asked). There wasn’t enough silk for a wedding dress for my eldest sister, but we managed to make a very fetching negligee for her one-night honeymoon before her husband had to get back to his unit.”

Joyce Johnson remembers her older sister having knickers and slips made from parachute silk. “She was in the WAAF and said that every base had a store room of damaged goods, including torn parachutes.

Those in charge turned a blind eye to the unofficial use of the silk, she said, because it did so much to boost morale, especially among the men!”

As well as knickers made from parachute silk, Gerald Burton also remembers dressing gowns made from RAF blankets. “Not as glamorous but a lot more practical.”

Andy Murray

MUCH has been said about the new mature Andy Murray.

What was really impressive was not just that amazing floodlit match against Stanislas Wawrinka – although the tennis was fantastic – but that when he finally fell to his knees as the victor after four exhausting hours on court, Andy Murray then had to answer the inevitable trite questions from the BBC interviewer. At the very moment when he must have wanted to yell in triumph, sob with exhaustion or, at the very least, collapse into the shower, he answered politely and thoughtfully, without a sign of impatience.

That’s what I call being a grown-up.

Why I'm proud to be part of this campaign

Dear Sharon,
THANK you for referring to me in your article last week. I am sorry that you did not enjoy my portrait.

I feel, however, that it is worth taking this opportunity to point out that I have not been advocating that we give up eating fish. On the contrary, I want us all (including the two billion in the developing world who rely on fish for their protein) to continue to keep fishermen in business and eat fish for generations to come. I am more for eating well than worrying about killing things that have eyes.

The aim of the campaign is to raise awareness to this imminent catastrophe and try to reverse the depletion of stocks. This still can be achieved if we act now. Consumers can help significantly by demanding sustainably sourced fish, but in the bigger picture it is governments who need to be pressured to make the reforms that their scientific advisers are urging; more logical and informed management of our fishing methods, tighter conditions for our foreign importers and, most of all, a real commitment to dedicating more marine protected zones around our own coasts, European fishing waters and globally.

You can throw all the rotten tomatoes you like, but please don’t misquote me!

I expect you were misled into believing that I was calling for a halt on eating fish by the sloppy and prejudiced writing of a few lazy and irresponsible reporters. It is a pity that more and more it takes celebrities to attract the attention of the media. I would rather see some of the terrific people who have devoted their working lives to the issue – marine biologists, dignitaries and campaigners – being given the publicity that came so easily to me. But, such is the media climate today, that I am making an effort to get this urgent message across on their behalf.

Unlike you and many of your readers these “terrific people” are amazed and delighted by the success of the media coverage. The satisfaction this has given me far out-weighs any criticism I am made to suffer.

Incidentally, the idea that putting myself out there for a cause is going to get me nearer to being offered a job at the Donmar or the National Theatre is extremely doubtful but, while I am resting, it is great to be busy doing something I believe in so passionately and I feel very privileged to be allowed to feel I can make a difference.

Kind regards,
Greta Scacchi