You know what Cockfield folk are like for a bit of banter, if they can have a go at you, they will and it’s even more frustrating when they make you laugh along with them at your own expense!

Last week I was at work when I got a text message from Duncan Sams wanting to know when I could cut his hair; here’s the series of texts that went back and forth.

Dunc… Any chance of a haircut today?

Me … Tomorrow bout 4.30 is the earliest.

Dunc… Giz a text some time 2morra if ya can fit me in. Nee rush. As just walking round looking like Terry Kipling!!

I was in the pub on Monday night and, as it happens, in walked Terry Kipling. I couldn’t wait to show him the text message. “The cheeky t**t!” says Terry, but then burst out laughing. “Ah well,” he says, “he may have a point!!”

What goes around comes around as the saying goes and I didn’t have long to wait before it was my turn for a bit of the Cockfield wit.

I was sat watching the football with my back to the door but was aware that someone had just walked in. A quick glance round and I saw that it was John Clennell.

John has owned some of the best pubs and hotels in the area including the Queens Head in Bishop Auckland and the Manor House in West Auckland. More recently, he has owed a bar in the west end of London and establishments as far a field as Peterborough. However, the lad is back in area for the time being and often calls in the Middle House for a pint - or two!

“Alright John?” I shouted, turning back to watch the match. “Oh err, alright err… Oh it’s Nigel!” says John. “Sorry about that youngan.” He went on, “I’m no good with faces but I never forget a pair of ears!!”

CHEEKY T**T!