A certain mobile phone company whose name I won't mention, that starts with a "V" and ends with an "e" has set a new record for highway robbery this week.

Pity the poor man who only needs a mobile "for emergencies" and who doesn't want to be bothered learning how to use it for anything else. Case in point, my husband.

He certainly joined the Techno Revolution several years ago. The evidence of that is the fact that I'm sitting here in this country, at this precise moment, typing furiously. But enough about that as we don't want to upset the family.

I had an old "starts with a V and ends with an e" mobile that I gave to my husband to use when he had a part time job and was away from a landline all day. That was so many years ago, I can't even remember.

Since that time, the phone sat and wasn't used..except for an occasional call from me to him in the car, telling him to please pick me up at the designated coordinates. For some unknown reason, this past Tuesday, the aforementioned company decided to disconnect the phone, keep the money that was remaining on it, and not tell anyone. (including me) Would an email have killed you, or a text for God's sake? Some kind of WARNING????

All I know is that I was standing on the street corner desperately trying to call JB in the car, and I really didn't fancy walking home and leaving him to drive around wondering "WTF"? Luckily, he came looking for me, and there I was...standing in front of the dental office with my glasses on and my hair blowing in the breeze, swearing like a sailor. (it wasn't a pretty sight).

I came home and promptly logged onto "starts with a V and ends with an e's" website, where I was greeted to my account balance of "0". Funny, I thought, there was around £8 on that phone last time I checked!! I sent the "Customer Service", which should be called "Lack of Customer Service" an email and they actually gleefully responded within 24 hours to tell me that because the phone hadn't been used "in 90 days", they disconnected me and kept the money that I had put on it. They very nicely offered to sell me a new sim card for £5 though.....AS IF!!!!

This is all just so amazing to me, and they informed me that it's "my fault" because in the SMALL PRINT, this practice is clearly explained , and had I been paying attention, yadda, yadda, yadda. Bottom line is that "starts with a V and ends with an e" must make quite a tidy haul ripping people off in this fashion. I guess in this country, one is unable to have a mobile in the car to use "just in case"? Said phone is now going to have a new home in the "garbage can" , as I call it because I'm foreign. Nothing wrong with it really, but it and the box it came in ,etc..are all getting chucked.

Next time I need to be picked up from somewhere, I'll have to rely on my voice, and just scream for JB to come pick me up. Yes, I DO have a phone and NO it isn't from this lovely and obviously very rich company. I barely use mine either, but had better make sure it's used once in a while so I don't lose even more money. Better yet, maybe perhaps I need to read the SMALL PRINT and see what kind of terrible things this other company is threatening to do to me if I don't conform to their wishes. They can't be as bad as "starts with a V and ends with an e" now can they? Thank you, as always, for listening.