THE woman on the bus was looking out at one of those new housing estates that are springing up everywhere these days. "It's all the refugees coming over here, " she said to her companion. "Thousands of them. They want somewhere to live."

Well, that's a new one on me. I know asylum seekers are frequently accused - by the BNP in particular - of taking the houses of honest white English folk. But new detached houses at over a £100,000 a throw? I don't think so.

It just shows how distorted this whole subject can get. Asylum seekers have become the bogey-men, the people to blame for everything that's wrong with society - just as the Jews so often were in days gone by. To make matters worse, the latest scandal over foreign criminals has played right into the hands of the bigots. People who probably think of Churchill as a hero voted for a party that shares many views with Hitler. How weird is that?

The trouble is successive governments have fallen over themselves to show how tough they are on asylum seekers. They're just not very good at it. They let the criminals go and come down hard on the soft targets, people like the Kapecha family from Malawi, who weren't allowed to return to the Dorset town from which they'd been deported even to attend their daughter's wedding.

Instead of all this macho posturing, the Government needs to try to encourage a positive acceptance of those refugees who are in real need. Housing them in the poorest parts of the country, among people who already feel marginalised, is not the way to do it. There are places where refugees have been easily accepted, but that's happened when local authorities have prepared the ground with care, so the community feels it's playing an active part in welcoming these people among them.

And why on earth shouldn't refugees with a definite skill be allowed to work? Most of them desperately want to - like the talented footballer from the Ivory Coast who's longing to play for Marske United, only Home Office rules won't let him.

And before you say it's easy to talk about humane treatment of asylum seekers when you've never met any - well, three years ago, I lived for six months in a London street where a large number of refugees were housed in overcrowded, run-down hotels.

They were quiet, polite people. Their children went to the local school (which, incidentally, does well in league tables).

You'd see the mothers - graceful women in colourful robes - taking the children up the road in the morning, collecting them at night. Those same children played out on the pavement after school, but always stood aside with a smile and an apology if you wanted to pass. The whole area had a higher proportion of refugees than most parts of the country, yet you could walk through the streets at night without fear of attack.

So by all means let's be firm with the criminals who come among us, wherever they're from. But let's also acknowledge that they're a minority, and that it's a mark of a civilised society to welcome those in distress or need who seek our help. That's surely not too much to ask?