On TV

The Unteachables (C4)

I CURED myself of my addiction to Neighbours some years ago. But, in the interests of celebrating its 20th anniversary, felt obliged to stroll down Ramsay Street once more, especially as the producers made so much effort to mark the occasion with a special edition.

Apart from Harold and Lou, residents seem more like Strangers than Neighbours these days. I hardly recognised anyone among the current cast.

Those that were familiar seemed to be miserable. Dr Karl was moping around because it appeared he wasn't the daddy of some infant.

Then Paul Robinson came hobbling into view. He's not the man he was. He's lost a leg. Where he's mislaid it remains a mystery as no-one thought fit to explain it.

It appears that people still don't like him. The dialogue hasn't changed much either, although people don't say "G'day" to Paul but "You're not wearing your leg".

Episode 4773 wasn't the usual instalment of Neighbours. Someone from the BBC had made a documentary about Ramsay Street featuring dozens of former residents, providing a good excuse for a trip down memory lane.

Several of them - ones still able to walk unaided - returned to make up the numbers. There was Doug Willis and Philip Martin. And goodness, Joe Mangel waltzed back into Erinsborough with a cheery "Good day, chuck" as though he'd never been away.

The director of the documentary was Annalise, who's probably the last person you'd imagine would become a documentary film-maker. This is a blonde who looks like she'd be more comfortable in front of a camera than pointing it at Ramsay Street's finest.

Her film-making style was simply to edit together a string of congratulatory comments from past residents, enabling spectators to see how much they've aged. Those unable to make it weren't left out as clips from Scott and Charlene's wedding video were screened.

It was left to Annalise to sum up why neighbours had become good friends. "Life is worth living in a community that cares, in a place where there's always someone waiting with a cuppa, a helping hand and an endless supply of kindness," she said.

I must confess I didn't recognise Ramsay Street from that description (just as I didn't recognise the reappearance of Danny Ramsay, from the early days of Neighbours). How could she say that about a place rife with death, disease, murder, adultery, vandalism, financial skulduggery and back-stabbing. And, of course, bad hairstyles. Scott's mullet remains one of the great TV crimes of the century.

The badly behaved schoolchildren in The Unteachables had reason to celebrate too as the series ended. Nine of the 12 made it through to the last episode and, to see how they'd changed, became teaching assistants for the day.

Amazingly, considering their unruly classroom antics at the start, they turned into positive role models when given responsibility. There was something quite touching seeing reformed tearaway Zaak patiently and sympathetically helping his primary school class with their lessons.

The Mikado, Newcastle Theatre Royal

ONE of Gilbert and Sullivan's most popular shows, this production from the unfailingly brilliant Carl Rosa company was colourful, tuneful and funny - all the ingredients for a great evening's entertainment.

The costumes were authentic and beautiful, with everyone being very careful when moving backwards because they were all wearing Japanese-style flip-flops. Especially noticeable was the work the cast must have put in on the etiquette of the fan. So much a part of the Japanese social scene, men and women alike used their fan to great effect as part of the overall choreography.

The singing, as always with the Carl Rosa company, was superb. The handsome hero Nanki-Poo, played by Ivan Sharpe, swept Charlotte Page's twitteringly demure Yum-Yum off her feet at the risk of losing his head completely. Victoria Ward as Pitti-Sing was delightful, cheekily setting her cap at the mighty Mikado. Patricia Leonard sang beautifully and revealed considerable comic talent standing in at short notice for Nuala Willis as the stately Katisha, well past her sell-by date but convinced she is the Mikado's daughter-in-law elect.

For me, it's always the clown who steals the show, and Simon Butteriss as the Lord High Executioner, Ko-Ko, just sparkled. His comic dancing and facial expressions had the audience in fits of laughter, and he wrote the additional lyrics for the patter song As Some Day It May Happen, about the Tory party leadership and avian flu. He lit up the stage whenever he came on, and received a well-deserved cheer when he took his bow.

l Until Saturday.

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Sue Heath