WITHIN a couple of days of arriving in Barbados you begin to lose touch with your feet. They start to slop, as you learn to put only minimum effort into lifting them off the ground. With mules and flip-flops you can get away with not raising them at all. The key is to slide, from the pool to the bar and back again.
Then again, you can always do as the Barbadans do and put your feet up altogether. Some are so laid-back they're virtually horizontal.
Things happen at a more restful pace on the most eastern of the islands in the Caribbean. The locals have a slower way of doing things - probably developed over centuries of living in 90 degree heat and fierce sunshine - and energy is conserved as much as possible. That's not to say they're not attentive, it's just, you're not in a hurry are you....
A trip to Barbados is the ultimate rest. Stress is strictly forbidden, bad moods are banned. You go there to learn the art of relaxation.
Apart from the heat, the history of the island could have something to do with it. Its remote position means it was never threatened with hostile invasion and has enjoyed peace
Amerindians are believed to have been on the island for more than 1,000 years. The first Europeans to discover it were Portuguese who named it 'Os Barbados' after the giant fig trees they found there. When the English arrived in 1627 it was uninhabited.
Most of the 265,000 people who live there now are descended from slaves brought from Africa by the English plantation owners. The older generations still work on the sugar plantations; the younger people prefer work in the towns and in tourism.
Barbados remains an independent member of the Commonwealth and it's known in some guide books as Little England. It's hard to see how such a label stuck - the only hints of England are a mini Nelson's column in a square in Bridgetown, the capital, and the fact that they drive on the left. English is the native tongue, not that you'd know. As someone told me: "They cut off the end and beginning of words and you just have to make sense of what's left."
Barbados has a strong identity, but no way is it English. Step on one of the yellow buses up the west coast if you've any doubts. You'll be treated to reggae music as you sway with the locals and their shopping and schoolgirls in uniform singing along to the latest rasta hits. At B$1.50 a time (about 40p) it's a hilarious and cheap attraction, compared with B$10 for a hotel minibus.
The local currency is the Barbados dollar which you can order from bureaux de change in the UK, but US dollars are just as widely accepted.
Just 21 miles long and 14 miles wide, Barbados' position, where the Atlantic meets the Caribbean Sea, makes it an island of contrasts. The west coast is calmer - white sand, palm trees and clear water.
About half way up the coast is Holetown where a monument marks the spot where Captain John Powell claimed the island for the English.
It's a picturesque place not least because of its chattel village shops, fine pastel painted examples of the wooden huts in which the majority of Barbadans live; those expecting upmarket Caribbean should remember that Barbados is a Third World country.
Also in Holetown is a shopping mall with a good branch of Cave Shepherd, the Barbados department store - the best gifts to take home are island rum, boxed chocolate rum cake, watches and emeralds.
Patisserie Flindt is worth a stop if you're craving some European cakes and cappuccino.
While the island is well served with buses, getting around is best done by hiring a car (£40 a day) or taking an island tour, of which there are many (about £50 per person).
Most will include a visit to Harrison's Cave. An electric train takes visitors, sporting hard hats over serviettes for hygiene and hilarity, underground to view the stalactites and stalagmites.
To learn more about the island's floral and fauna the Flower Forest is worth a visit. Other worthy stops are the rum factories, plantations open to the public and the Barbados Wildlife Reserve where you can get eye-to-eye with the island's green monkeys.
Most island tours give visitors a glimpse of the rugged Atlantic east coast from the town of Bathsheba. It's a surfers' paradise of rolling waves but the rocks and undercurrents make it unsafe for swimming.
Swinging round to the south coast brings you to Bridgetown. Despite it being on the cruise ship route, it's not a town of designer shops and street cafes. In fact, most of the streets were being dug up when we were there and there is little to fill more than a morning.
But few people come to Barbados to shop. Almost half the visitors are British who come for what Barbados does best - sun, sea and sand. Unless you're a keen sun-worshipper or water sports fanatic you may struggle to fill a fortnight.
The hotels are geared up for this, trying to offer everything you could possibly need on site. Most are clustered along the Caribbean west coast and the south coast of the island.
Elegant Hotels group, the biggest on the island, has four in the west - Crystal Cove, Coconut Creek, Tamarind Cove and Colony Club. All have a distinct identity and are designed to appeal to a particular type of holidaymaker. Coconut is small and intimate, while Crystal is more lively yet still favoured by couples and families.
Tamarind has the longest stretch of beach so is the best for watersports, while Colony Club has an older clientele who return year after year (during February children are banned).
Turtle Beach is for sporty families and wildlife lovers if you're lucky enough to catch a glimpse of the turtles who nest and lay their eggs in the sand.
There's a choice of rooms to suit need and preference - our junior suite at Crystal Cove was on two floors and had two bathrooms. The hotel is managed by Adrian Grant, a native Barbadan who 15 years ago spent two seasons playing cricket in the North-East. He has fond memories of living in "Geesborough".
Tropical weddings are held at all five hotels, and Tamarind Cove has bridal suites. All the hotels have pools.
Crystal, Coconut and Turtle are all inclusive, which means breakfast, lunch and dinner, tea and biscuits in the afternoon and all drinks including cocktails - pina coladas from sunrise to sunset, or you could try the local Banks' beer.
Having never done all-inclusive before I was dubious about how good the food would be. I needn't have worried. Most evenings were three-course with six main course choices, including reef fish, flying fish and other local specialities as well as Asian and European dishes. Barbecues and buffets provided a change.
It's possible to eat at any of the other hotels in the group. But there is no inter-hotel transport at night which does mean an expensive taxi ride.
Barbados is not a place for sight-seers, though Elegant's excellent water sports, most of which are free, means there's plenty for those who want to make the most of the island's natural beauty. On the other hand, most people go there just to relax. The Barbadans would approve.
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