Why are we waiting?

But I think it is getting better. Every day I come across really helpful, pleasant assistants who seem to want to help.

But there are still a lot who are terminally rude and stupid. And you can be sure they're the ones you'll get. It takes only one utter moron to have us all tearing our hair out and swearing never, ever, to go into that shop again.

Not quite as dramatic as the splendid woman I was once queuing behind, who, clearly frustrated beyond all reasonable measure by the particular bovine unhelpfulness of the girl at the checkout, threw a giant bag of frozen peas up in the air. They landed with a glorious splat and frozen peas rolled everywhere.

Yes of course it was silly and childish and didn't make anything better. But it was a marvellous gesture which is why, after the first embarrassed intake of breath, the rest of us cheered her on.

The survey, by Altwood SB, apparently proves that price is not everything, that what we crave is a pleasant shopping experience.

If only...

A lot of it - most of it - is probably simply a lack of good manners. But as good manners and courtesy are now curiously old-fashioned qualities, we can't just pick on the poor old sales assistants for their lack of them.

We all need to be loved. That's why workers who are treated well by their employers tend on the whole, to treat customers well. No one's going to put themselves out to boost their employer's profits, if the employer treats them like dirt.

Then there's that old axiom that the customer is always right. Well, the customer isn't. Quite often, the customer is a pain in the bum. We've all watched Watchdog. We know our rights and boy do we insist on shouting them out to some powerless assistant.

It's good manners, again, isn't it?

Sometimes, shopping just isn't worth the effort. The effort of getting there, waiting for a bus or finding a parking space and paying over the odds for the privilege, of pushing past people and being pushed by them, of waiting your share of those 3.3 million hours just to be told: "We haven't got it. No demand."

So instead we sit at home and shop by phone or over the Internet.

Yes of course it lacks the human touch and sometimes that's the bliss of it. No gum-chewing indifference, no blank-eyed off-hand incivility. No aching feet.

As shopping from home gets easier, retailers are going to have to tempt us back into the High Street, otherwise we'll just stay at home and shout at our computers instead.

But if you're shopping in the real world today then try being nice to the sales assistant. With luck, they might just want to be nice back to you.

And we can all go home with a smile.

THE Australian Olympics are being hailed, genuinely, as the best ever. And not just because Britain did so well. Commentators have particularly praised the atmosphere in the city, the friendliness, the big welcome.

The Australians, of course, spent a terrific amount of money on the games. But did you realise that there were 47,000 volunteers acting as guides, assistants, all purpose gofers and generally helping to keep organisation, spectators and competitors to be in the right place at the right time. 47,000 people working for the love of it. No wonder Sydney was special.

SO, despite the exam results, we still think boys are cleverer than girls. Well, are you surprised?

The same day that survey was published, another piece of research proved that women still do far more housework than men. Men are getting better, says the Abbey National report, but it's going to be at least 15 years before they do as much around the house as women. Which means it's a long time before that cooker gets cleaned.

But if men and women are both working full time, and the women are still doing most of the housework, who do you think are the dumb ones