IMAGINE a man with a history of violent behaviour pinning you to the floor and punching you in the face. What would you do? Ask him nicely to stop... please?

Mother-of-two Denise Carr bit her attacker. But unfortunately the spot she sank her teeth into was his groin. It was unfortunate for her attacker Neil Hutchinson, who lost a testicle.

And it was unfortunate for 29-year-old Mrs Carr who this week was sentenced to six months in jail at Newcastle Crown Court.

It was a grotesque, revolting injury. Just the mention of it is enough to bring a tortured, pained expression, even tears, to a grown man's face.

It could even ensure Mrs Carr the sort of notoriety Mrs Bobbit - forever remembered as the woman who chopped off her husband's penis - had in America.

But there is a danger that this particularly hideous spectre of injured manhood, along with the bad taste jokes and lewd humour which inevitably surrounds such a case, overshadows more important issues.

Such as the fact that Mrs Carr acted in self-defence, to protect herself in the middle of a brutal attack. And for that, she is condemned to six months in jail while her children, aged six and three, are left without a mother.

Women should take note. Next time a violent man pins us down and attacks us we now most definitely know what not to do.

But, to return to my original question, and assuming we can think rationally when overpowered in the heat of the moment: what are we supposed to do?

SHERYL Gascoigne, ex-wife of North-East footballer Paul, is promoting a police campaign against domestic violence. Her husband famously admitted hitting her, after she was photographed leaving a hotel, bruised and battered. But no charges were brought and his life continued as normal. Sheryl's intentions may be worthy, but is the former battered wife of a man who clearly appears to have got away with it, really supposed to fill us with confidence in how effectively our police force deals with domestic violence?

THE eagle-eyed ticket inspector who fined Cherie Blair for not having a rail ticket has, one year later, been relieved of his duties. And the policeman who arrested the Blairs' son Euan for being drunk and incapable has also been arrested after being found in a distressed state. Obviously, these events are not connected. But would anyone in a uniform dare present the Blairs with so much as a parking ticket now?

KATE Winslet has been criticised for admitting she is dieting after years of urging women to be proud of their curves. "I despise myself," she says. But where is the contradiction? Kate was right, her full, voluptuous figure is gorgeous. All she wants to do now is lose some of the extra four stone she put on in pregnancy, a sensible and healthy thing to do. So why get so weighed down about it?

AT last, someone is giving the Janet and John books, which seemed hopelessly old-fashioned even when I was reading them in the 1960s, a new, up-to-date image. Gone are the sailor suits and smock frocks and boring trips to the shops to buy a brown cap. But will Janet now be shown ordering the morning-after pill over her mobile phone while John spends all day glued to his PlayStation?

THE BBC's Changing Rooms programme makers deny causing a huge rise in DIY accidents by encouraging people to take on work beyond their capabilities. But anyone inspired to copy the make-overs, particularly those devised by Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen, should never be allowed near a drill, staple gun or any other potentially dangerous equipment. Because they clearly need their eyes tested.

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