WE HAD barely sat down for our starters when the killer struck. A man few of us had even noticed in the cocktail bar walked through the door into the dining room and promptly collapsed, clutching his throat and groaning in agony. The other 70 or so diners appeared shocked. Then they started to whisper. Then they giggled.
The 'murder', we all knew, was for dramatic purposes only, the first crime in what would no doubt turn into a weekend of death. The question was: who would be next?
At the Old Swan in Harrogate, anything was possible. The hotel is best known as the place where Agatha Christie sought sanctuary when she 'disappeared' in 1926. Since then, it has become synonymous with murder mysteries, and is the chosen residence of Brainstormer Murders for its killer weekends.
The fun begins on the Friday evening, when the guests are invited to meet in the cocktail lounge and are handed their little black book in which clues are to be noted.
Immediately, you start to look around, eyeing up your fellow weekenders - we wondered why the Freemans from Essex and Ray and Julie from Wigan had chosen to sit with us. Were they being friendly, or had they targeted us for a reason?
We started to quiz them, asking far more personal questions than we would normally of complete strangers, but it was all in the interests of evidence-gathering - and maybe saving our own skin.
Once in the dining room, everyone found their seat at tables of eight or more. It was a bizarre coincidence - or was it? - that the Essex and Wigan couples were also our fellow diners. Also on our table were a mother and daughter, Pauline and Sally, from Manchester (there was no physical resemblance - were they really related?) and an elderly couple, Geoff and Dorothy Ellerker, from down the road in Horsforth. They seemed innocent enough, but were asking lots of questions.
We soon discovered in this atmosphere of suspicion and lies, you could have a little fun of your own by making yourself seem 'dodgy'. My partner Ian was quizzed on his local knowledge - if he was really from Darlington, which way did he come to Harrogate? "We drove via Northallerton to avoid the Friday night traffic on the A1," fibbed Ian.
"Ah, but I saw the news on TV before dinner and Northallerton was closed off because of flooding," said the elderly man. Caught out lying straightaway - and by then everyone was suspicious of the "journalists" from Darlington.
"Where's your press card?" asked Ray; "It's in the room," said Ian.
"If you're really a journalist, why aren't you asking any questions?"
"Because it's our job to listen, too," I answered.
I could tell they weren't satisfied. Great, an entire weekend with people who are watching our every move and not believing a word we say. During dinner we were told the dead man was Bill Young, and he'd died of cyanide poisoning. We were invited, in groups made up of two guests from each table, to search his possessions for clues. We stayed in these groups for the rest of the weekend; being split from your partner meant we started to become suspicious of each other.
Bill Young's suitcase contained a few clothes, exotic travel brochures, cards for lap dancing clubs, a piece of paper full of numbers torn into shreds, some blue and white capsules and a newspaper cutting.
We went to bed mulling over the clues, making sure the door was locked securely behind us.
The next day's sleuthing began straight after breakfast, following the news that Malcolm and Elsie Patterson had been found dead. There'd been a late night party in their room and they were stabbed to death at about 4.30am. Our group trooped up to room 231, where two scarlet stains on the bed confirmed the Pattersons came to a violent end. The search revealed more evidence of travel, more pills and a small piece of a newspaper story.
Saturday afternoon was free time, giving us a chance to look around Harrogate, shop and take tea at Betty's.
Back at the hotel, at the dinner dance that evening we found ourselves with the Broughs and the Brocklesbys, the couples who dined with the Pattersons the night before - chicken supreme with the killers beckoned!
But worse was to come. Two seats remained ominously empty - the Ellerkers, the elderly couple from our table on the first night, failed to turn up, and on a weekend like that you just knew they'd come to some grisly end.
However, all the suspicion fell on us, "the journalists", because we arrived late and left early.
The truth about the Ellerkers was confirmed the next morning - two more to add to the growing list of victims. By then I was suffering from information overload - too many clues and red herrings all pointing to different people but no clear motive.
Our group, like all the others, was given an hour or so to name the killer or killers and the motive. Put simply, we didn't have a clue and took a wild guess, based on our suspicions of a young woman called Ruth and an old lady with her grey hair in a Miss Marple-esque bun. We thought they were the killers, thought we didn't really know why.
Meanwhile, my partner's team turned on him, accusing him of the murders. "He goes to bed early, doesn't drink, hasn't asked any questions and he's looked furtive all weekend," they said. Poor, innocent Ian.
In the end our group was right, for accusing the murderous Ruth at least.
The true story centred on a drug dealing gang of friends who popped each other off to gain dominance, and a sideline about getting revenge for the killing of a policeman some years ago. We all left more confused than ever, disappointed that the ghost of Mrs Christie hadn't imbibed any sleuthing skills in any of us.
The murder mystery weekend is fun, even those who don't particularly enjoy social gatherings will find it easy to get to know their fellow guests. Brainstormer Murders don't use professional actors, so the 'normal' person sitting next to you can easily turn out to be a ruthless killer. Plots are never repeated and different people are used to play the characters every time.
Although the Old Swan is no longer the elegant hotel for the rich that it was in Agatha Christie's day, the dining room retains some of the grandeur. Unfortunately, Mrs Christie's ground floor room no longer exists. Our bedroom was large and comfortable, and the food is of a high standard, particularly breakfast. If there's one thing you need for all that detective work, it's a full stomach.
FACTFILE
Murder mystery weekends at the Old Swan Hotel, Swan Road, Harrogate, last from Friday evening to late morning Sunday. Sunday lunch can be taken at extra cost. Breakfasts, Saturday lunch and dinner on Friday and Saturday nights are included.
For more information on Brainstormer Murders, tel: 0113-262 8033 or (01262) 602859, or the Old Swan Hotel on (01423) 500055.
The next murder mystery weekends are due to take place on February 16-18 February and March 30-April 1
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