IT WOULD be all too easy to start a column like this every week by asking: "What on earth is the world coming to?"
But this week, especially, I'm in the mood for a rant, a tirade, even perhaps a spot of gasket-blowing as I hear all around exclaiming: "Never in the creation" or "Whatever next?"
Apart from MAFF's continuing chasing of their tails in pursuit of some semblance of control over foot-and-mouth, my cage has been rattled by blinkers - partly those worn by the horses which brought mayhem to the Grand National, but mainly those restricting the vision of the British judicial system.
You may remember the judge who once asked in court: "Who is this Gazza?" And there have been plenty more examples of the bewigged brethren's blinkered lifestyle.
Now we have the ludicrous situation where a trial which has cost £8m has to start again because of an article in a Sunday newspaper.
We trust a jury to decide whether people are innocent or guilty of their alleged crimes, yet we cannot trust them to ignore what they may have read or heard about in a tabloid with questionable scruples.
I am, of course, tempering my tirade because I'm not allowed to comment on the Sunday Mirror article. The judge said so.
The same judge can doubtless claim that he was sticking to the letter of the law in opting to restart the trial, which will eventually cost almost as much as Rio Ferdinand. Well the law really must be an ass, and trial by jury is a shambles if it can be derailed as easily as this.
Ferdinand must now wait until next season to find out whether Lee Bowyer and Jonathan Woodgate will remain free to ply their trade as his Leeds teammates.
What I really don't understand about the trial is how Bowyer's defence could urge the jury to acquit him so that he could pursue his ambition to score the winning goal in a World Cup final.
It seems to me utterly nonsensical that the total irrelevance of Bowyer's ambition can by introduced at a sensitive stage of the trial, yet the whole business is blown out of the water by a newspaper article.
BACK to the Grand National, it was the blinkered duo Paddy's Return and Edmond who caused the pile-ups, and I question whether horses should be allowed to wear blinkers for the first time in such a prestigious race, as was the case with Edmond.
The pair were just as much to blame for the low number of finishers as the hock-deep mud, which had several pundits suggesting the race should not have taken place.
There was far less risk of injury, however, than on firm going with its faster pace and bolder jumping, and while Red Marauder may be one of the worst jumpers to have won the race, the victory was a huge personal triumph for jockey Richard Guest.
It was a complete vindication of the very same compassionate methods which earned him a third ban three years ago and prompted him to give up riding in disgust.
The stewards felt he hadn't tried hard enough to win. But Guest doesn't believe in driving horses too hard and it was by gently popping Red Marauder over the Aintree fences that the pair survived.
How ironic that the race was shown live for the first time in China. They're probably already building replicas of Becher's and Valentine's on their paddy fields. Hopefully, some of you had an each-way flutter on my tip, Blowing Wind, who finished third and looked a likely winner until the blinkered, blundering Edmond got in the way.
TIGER Woods doesn't need blinkers. Put him on a golf course in a major event and he exists in a cocoon.
With his game, his body and his mind honed to perfection, nothing can distract him from his route to victory.
A missed three-foot putt four holes from the end of the Masters proved he's human and maintained a flicker of interest. It would have reduced lesser men to an attack of the yips, but it was his rivals who missed the vital putts.
When Brian Lara was breaking records with 375 against England and 501 not out against Durham in 1994, he had the chance to be as dominant in his field as Woods.
But with Lara we are talking about someone who stood at slip for Warwickshire with a mobile phone in his pocket.
He became a showman, whereas Woods retains the humility of someone who believes he has a god-given talent and it is his duty to make the absolute most of it.
Jack Nicklaus was 46 when he won the last of his 18 majors at Augusta, so on that basis Tiger has a further 21 years to collect the 13 majors he still needs to surpass Jack's record. My guess is he'll do it with at least ten years to spare.
Published: Friday, April 13th
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