HOT PANTS: A new invention could bring instant relief for women who suffer from monthly misery. A Swedish inventor has come up with self-heating knickers which contain a gel that can retain heat for up to half-an-hour. Anyone who has tried to get comfortable while balancing a hot water bottle on their back or tummy will love this invention which was specifically designed to get rid of painful cramps.

Although the hot pants are meant to be purely medicinal, they could come in handy for a lot of other people. All those North-East lasses who go out on a Friday night wearing the bare minimum, could keep cosy underneath their skimpy outfits and market traders would probably love to be warm when they're working on a cold day.

The pants have already won a design award and, hopefully, some enterprising businesswoman will soon have them in production. Not as sexy as an Ann Summer thong, but they certainly have their place.

MAN MADE: Forget insipid boy bands who all sound the same and only find fame because of their looks - there's new musical group on the horizon. ManBand comprises five men over 50 who have been brought together to bring a bit of maturity to the charts. It is a manufactured band, but the quintet have more than cheeky grins, youthful complexions and dance moves on their side. This group can actually hold a tune and they've lived a bit.

At the moment, the music industry fails to cater for anyone who has got past puberty, even though there is a whole generation of music lovers with disposable income to throw at a decent act they can relate to.

ManBand has yet to secure a recording contract or a manager but hopefully their age will act in their favour.

With any luck, they could be the new Barry Manilow or Cliff Richard - well, someone needs to get ready for when they finally fall off their perches!

REVEALING ALL: Where has the trend for couples getting it on at major sporting events come from? First there was that couple who got fruity in the centre circle of a football pitch, then the man and woman who showed their very British white bums to the punters at Royal Ascot. The latest love match was between two youngsters at Wimbledon who sneaked into a VIP lounge. Stewards were said to be shocked by their actions but, sadly, this kind of entertainment is becoming a regular occurrence. It seems streaking has become too commonplace for the average exhibitionist.

Goodness knows where it will all end - could we soon see romps in the ring at boxing matches or on the ice at the World Skating Championships?

The way things are going, any sporting feats are soon to be overshadowed by the hot action going on off the pitch.

RUDE FATHERHOOD: Liam Gallagher has never claimed to be a new man but his behaviour after the birth of son, Gene was amazing even by his standards. Just three hours after the birth he was in the local pub downing a pint. While there is nothing wrong with wetting the baby's head, could he not have waited until girlfriend Natalie could have joined him? If anyone needed a drink it would have been her. Returning to the hospital, he swore at reporters who asked him how his baby was and then pushed one photographer aside, injuring him. Liam has been a celebrity long enough to realise the birth of his son was going to make headline news so, just for once, couldn't he have shown his joy at being a dad instead of playing up to his hard man image? Liam now has three kids by three different mothers and is failing miserably to give any of them a role model. His behaviour, language and attitude are simply telling his children that, because they have money, they don't have to respect anyone or anything. He'd be better off remembering where he came from and teaching his kids to count their very many blessings.