LOOK at me, look at me. Don't look at me, don't look at me. It's not surprising the press and public get confused over whether Victoria 'Posh Spice' Beckham shuns or courts publicity. The reality is that she shuns it, demonstratively, when she's not getting enough, in order to get more. Shout don't look at me loud enough and people will, of course, look.

The latest example of the dichotomy between her desire for privacy and her thirst for publicity is her new website, which invites the world into the home she takes great care to protect from prying eyes.

Click on www.victoriabeckham.mu (mu is normally associated with museum sites, indicating an implicit hope, perhaps, that she is doing something historic which will always be on record) and the voyeur travels along a yellow brick road, lined with cypress trees and cute little badger. The twin metal gates (albeit in cartoon form) swing open beneath a perfect rainbow and there, in all its glory, is the home, Beckingham Palace.

The heavy front door opens to reveal the good lady of the house and the camera pans up from daintily painted feet, up long slim legs, to a miniskirt, bare midriff and crop top before revealing the hand-drawn version of Posh Spice in all her Internet splendour.

She then does on the Net what she would never do in real life, she invites the surfer in for a look around her home, stopping along the way to reveal a host of secrets about herself, football-playing husband David and two-year-old son Brooklyn.

Did you know, for instance, that she hates spiders, loves fish, drinks Kir Royale, adores Audrey Hepburn and has a phobia about lifts and small toilets? Did you care?

Brooklyn loves Mickey Mouse, noisy toy cars and eating noodles. What a revelation.

And as for Becks? Well, he spills the beans on his wife, who he says picks her nose, leaves the tops off toothpaste and shampoo, and plucks her hairy belly. Which woman doesn't?

The knicker stories continue unchecked. Not only does David sometimes wear her strings, she admits to wearing her pants in her hair, which is, at least, a little novel.

After that you are free to roam - the throne room features the infamous wedding seats; the gallery is packed with Posh pictures; the nursery contains Brooklyn's game zone; the study comes complete with Victoria's diary; the dressing room offers loads of handy make-up hints; and the bathroom boasts twin sinks and dual thrones once again. Coming soon, you can even sing in the shower and send your recordings in to the site. Click in the right part of any of the rooms and all is revealed, or at least as much as they want to reveal.

Despite already being worth a reputed £32m, there are plenty of opportunities to swell the Beckham coffers further by visiting virtual VIP areas (at £1.50 a time) and playing one of Brooklyn's games, yours for £3.

It's novel, it's well done, it's utterly tacky, which kind of sums up the girl herself.

It also epitomises the internal struggle which goes on inside the popstar's head. While David is fast sloughing off his petulant image and becoming a half-decent role model for many youngsters, Mrs Beckham swings from snap-happy to camera-shy.

And according to clinical psychologist at Teesside University Barry Sudworth, this could be a sign of her insecurity. She shows the hallmarks of a person who has not had enough attention as a child, so is seeking it now.

"They are saying they shun publicity, yet they crave it," he says. "They still need to be regarded as being on top. Saying they need all this privacy is an image statement. It's like saying 'we are just ordinary people', yet the inner person wants to say they are far from ordinary."

She has built a Posh image by dressing in expensive clothes and jewellery and she is now transferring this to her home "showing she can decorate the house just like she decorates herself".

Mr Sudworth adds: "To us it might be flashy and tasteless but it is a reflection of herself. She says 'let us just be a little family'. But she can only do this for so long before the internal need takes over to show what she is doing."

Her indiscretions - the slip about the thong and the latest one about breast milk - are a continuation of her lack of taste and beyond the norms of a society she no longer inhabits.

"She isn't aware of the norms of the populace. She is only aware of the finite group she comes from, the popstars and those of showbiz ilk," he says.

The virtual house is another paradox, another case of look, don't look. But it could also be seen as a way of controlling the media she so badly wants but doesn't want. The world is encouraged to log-on and by doing so is distracted from the Beckham's real £3m mansion. By apparently opening the doors to their private lives and not only showing the furnishings but also letting the people in on their secrets, the Beckhams could be seen as sating the public's appetite. The price for this is atouch of privacy when they require it.

The economically-minded might also see the timing as being perfect, an invaluable tool to promote the imminent release of Posh's new single, Not Such an Innocent Girl. Perhaps she's not.

But perhaps that's all a bit too conspiratorial, a bit too well-thought out for people not renowned for their thought processes.

"The distressing thing for me as a psychologist is what she sees as positive things are going to be seen by the population as distasteful things," Mr Sudworth says.

And more often than not the craving for attention ultimately wins the battle for supremacy and it becomes a case of 'look at me'.