OH Bunty, where are you now that we need you? Girls' comics are not the same anymore, says an academic from Sunderland University. Bunty, School Friend, Girl and Jackie were full of heroines and role models.

Today's lot are junior versions of women's magazines "which offer a lot about consumerism and not a great deal else," says lecturer Mel Gibson.

Though I seem to remember a teen mag that had a nice big pic of Robbie William's hairy bum - now you wouldn't get that in Bunty.

Today's girls' mags are all about sex, shopping and boy bands. Despite their jolly big sisterly tone, just like the women's magazines, they end up making their readers feel inadequate.

If magazines keep reminding you that it's not a good idea to have under-age sex, then some poor worried teenager is going to fear she's the only one missing out.

Bad enough when you're 30, pretty devastating when you're ten.

But back in the Fifties and Sixties, "there were tales of solidarity," says Ms Gisbon, "of girls being adventurous, of strong central characters."

I'll say. The world of girls' comics was pretty short on bare bums and advice on oral sex, but was awash with Russian ballerinas, spies, lost jewels, poor girls who triumphed by hard work and plucky determination, and snobby rich girls who got their comeuppance.

It was a very honest, decent world, run to a strict moral code, where girls worked together for the greater good of the school, the performance or the family. Sneaks and liars were found out and cheats never prospered.

Above all, it was a girls' world. The heroines were girls and often the villains were as well - especially the French mistress if she had a large and beaky nose, a definite giveaway.

Boys rarely appeared in the stories and if they did, they were just friends, willing to help out in the girls' plans. But now the whole tone of girls' comics is that without a boy you are nothing, and not just because you need to borrow his bike to foil the robbers.

The heroines of Bunty and School Friend, even in the claustrophobic fifties, were bold and brave and independent, taking charge of their own destiny. Ironic, then, that after 40 years of feminism, our liberated daughters are merely being guided into how to ensnare a spotty boy.

What would the Four Marys say?

SO now they're doing a new series of Auf Wiedersehen Pet. There are plans for a new Forsyte Saga too. And Andy Pandy. They've already brought back Bill and Ben and Crossroads. Re-runs of Porridge and Dad's Army - shown so often that we all now know the scripts off by heart - regularly get high ratings.

Are there no new exciting ideas on television today? Well, there was Survivor. Mmm. Suddenly you can see the appeal of the golden oldies.

OH Lordy, now it's butterflies. The latest wedding craze from America, gradually gaining ground here, is to have real live butterflies instead of confetti. They're kept in a little box after they've hatched, ready to be released at just the right moment. What next? A flock of bluebirds? Three French hens, two turtledoves and a partridge in a pear tree?

Weddings have ceased to be a simple ceremony, but have developed into full-scale theatrical productions, worthy of an Oscar of two. Think of the Beckhams, of Madonna and Guy Ritchie, of Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta Jones.

And now, as well as the service, the reception, the party, the disco, the jazz band, the balloons, the fire-eaters, sky divers, parachutists and soprano, you have to have butterflies as well. As if the bride's mother didn't have enough to think of.

Sadly, it's almost bound to end in tears. After all that fuss and glamour - and all those butterflies - how can the humdrumness of marriage ever live up to such a start?

DESPITE my best intentions, I sometimes drive too fast. Senior Son always drives too fast.

Speed kills. We know that. And not just the drivers - there are those innocent people they take with them. It's been proved that where we have lots of cameras, speed drops and accidents and deaths fall dramatically.

So - although I'm bound to get caught one day - I actually welcome speed cameras. If we are so selfish that we cannot be trusted to drive within the legal limits, then we have only ourselves to blame.

People will spend fortunes, raise thousands to send sick children abroad for medical treatment, but can't be bothered to drive a little less fast and so save far many more lives, including their own. Daft, isn't it?

And let us not hear any more sanctimonious drivel about the rights of motorists.

Far more important than a few people's right to drive too fast for safety, is the right of many more people not to die tragically early deaths,

So smile for the cameras - you know it makes sense.

MADONNA'S learning Cockney rhyming slang. Watch out for her next video - no more sexy cowboys, but a barrow-load of cheerful Cockney wide-boys instead.

What next? A bit part on EastEnders?

Dear Sharon

I don't know how you can sensibly suggest paying to visit the doctor. It would affect all sorts of decent people who aren't living on benefits but aren't earning very much either. It's a real trip back to the bad old days.

My main reason for being against it is that it would be throwing yet more money at the NHS and we have plenty of proof that their efficiency has nothing to do with the amount of money they have. If anything, the more money they have, the bigger mess they make.

Our GPs are the backbone of the NHS. They would end up doing more paperwork for less money. Forget it.

N. Healey, Darlington

Dear Sharon

Payment for some medical procedures seems inevitable. People pay whatever it takes for pleasure and possessions, which makes reluctance to pay for better health so puzzling. Paying for meals in hospital is one option as we all heave to eat in or out of hospital.

Pensioners have to hand over their pensions for long- term treatment, so why not others?

The real test is what happens to the money. The ludicrous situation that happened at the Freeman Hospital where they had more clerical staff than nurses must never be repeated.

Mrs Shelagh Harnby, Stockton

Published: Wednesday, August 15, 2001