THEY were a familiar sight along the streets of Oxford - Harry Lawrence with his distinctive black beard always in the front seat of the tandem, daughter Ruth behind, academic gown billowing in the wind. Wherever the duo went they attracted stares, not because of her undoubted academic brilliance, but because she was only 12 when she went to university.

An A-grade in maths A level at nine, the youngest-ever Oxford University student, a first-class degree at 13 and then studying for a doctorate, Ruth Lawrence had become a national celebrity.

But among my fellow students at Oxford, 18 and 19-year-olds starting out at university, the child prodigy was not someone to be envied, but something of a freak. Rumours abounded that she was shunned by fellow students at her college, that she was little more than a mouthpiece for her father's opinions and that he accompanied her everywhere, before he was eventually banned from the common room by the student union.

In many ways, the tandem was symbolic of their relationship. Overbearing father in charge of steering and diminutive daughter at the back, pedalling to his rhythm. We would often sit and ponder whether she was really a genius or the creation of pushy parents with dreams of greatness for their daughter.

Now, Ruth Lawrence is married to a man 29 years her senior, has emigrated to Jerusalem, where she has a full-time post at the Hebrew University. She does not speak to her parents any more and she has vowed not to repeat the "hothouse" teaching methods used by her own father on either of her two children.

Hers is not the only tale of a child prodigy who has seen their dream turn sour. Sufiah Yusof went to Oxford to study maths at the age of 13, one of five gifted children taught by her father Farooq. But last year, at the age of 15, she ran away from college and refused to return home when she was eventually found by police, claiming her father had pushed her too far.

In a bitter e-mail to her parents, she described life in the family home as a "living hell" and said: "You've forfeited all rights to compassion and affection by your disgusting and cowardly behaviour. Try to damage me and I'll see you in hell."

Adam Dent was 14 when he went to Oxford to study chemistry but found it difficult to mix with other students. He left university in 1995 after he was falsely accused of assaulting a female undergraduate, even though charges were never brought, and he continued his studies with the Open University.

Problems of rifts with parents and difficulties in relationships with people of the same age are not uncommon for gifted children, according to Dr Joan Harvey, chartered psychologist at Newcastle University.

"If you bring children up yourself and teach them at home, unless you teach them with other children and give them plenty of opportunities to socialise, it may be that their social development is impaired to some extent," she says.

"There are a lot of issues and the primary one is that, if you concentrate on GCSE maths and you produce this result, are you sacrificing anything at all? I think there is a possibility that the child may well not be properly socialised."

The latest child prodigy is Arran Fernandez, who became the youngest person ever to pass a GCSE yesterday. He took his two maths exams at the age of five years and 11 months, and yesterday posed for pictures with his certificate recording his D grade and his favourite teddy bear, Pudsey.

"A GCSE at five in maths is startlingly good going," says Dr Harvey. "But I would still be worried that, unless the parents have made a huge amount of provision at socialisation, this might not be a very well-socialised child."

Arran's father, Dr Neil Fernandez, said schools did not push children hard enough, but, according to Dr Harvey, over-bearing parents can push too hard.

"It is not necessarily child prodigies - there are a lot of examples in America of extremely ambitious parents entering their children for beauty pageants," she says. "You get a very high achievement drive amongst the parents and it might make the children overly competitive.

"If all a child has ever known is a life of beauty pageants, she won't really understand what else is out there, and the problem with this drive to succeed is that there are inevitably a lot of losers. It is acceptable to encourage your children, but when it goes into overdrive and parents want over-achievement in their children, that is actually quite scary."

Dr Peter Congdon has seen thousands of exceptionally intelligent children over the last 20 years, through his work as educational psychologist for the Gifted Children's Information Centre. He uses tests to look at all aspects of intelligence, from non-verbal thinking to spatial tasks, to help parents decide on how their child can best develop.

And his work has given him an insight into the pitfalls awaiting those who neglect childhood in favour of academic achievements.

"The best preparation for growing up is to have lived fully as a child. Parents of clever children should not forget this," he says. "Accelerated mental development is sometimes at the risk of slowing down the social and emotional growth, and the result can be a lop-sided individual.

"There are times when a child, however intelligent, will want to play and act like a child, and growing up with other children is part of their necessary development. If they are concentrating on academic work, these children are missing out. You should challenge and stretch an intelligent, gifted child, or boredom, frustration and under-achievement can set in. But going overboard, trying to be the youngest to get a GCSE, can become lop-sided."

For some prodigies - Ruth Lawrence and Sufiah Yusof spring to mind - the result is estrangement from their parents. But it need not end this way for all gifted children, according to Dr Chris Kyriacou, reader in educational psychology at York University.

"There are cases of parents who do mishandle it, and their children don't really get a chance to mix with other children, and that doesn't bode well for their social development," he says. "But a lot of parents who educate gifted children at home go to great lengths to provide social interaction with other children. It is not quite as desperate and isolating as you might think.

"Parents encourage their children to do well at school and that is often a situation fraught with tension for anyone, not just gifted children, it is part of the way adolescents often have friction with their parents. A lot of gifted children are quite normal in many respects.

"Being gifted can create problems, but it is generally a good thing. They want to do well and have happy lives. A lot of them don't have problems and they go their own, sweet way."