Durham's six of the best

Others include Cholmondeley (probably pronounced Chumley) in Cheshire, and Keswick, which has the mountainous advantage of Skiddaw as backdrop.

None of the Feversham League's shrines to the country game - not Rievaulx, not High Farndale, not even Spout House in Bilsdale - warrants so much as a mention.

The Racecourse, says Wisden Cricket Monthly - the competition organiser - has "stirring views" of cathedral, castle and colleges. "It is bounded by the River Wear and framed by mature trees.

"When the Cathedral bells are chiming, it can be a heavenly cricket ground."

Durham have fond memories of the place, too. It was the scene of their first Sunday League game - Dean Jones smashed a big hundred in a victory over Lancashire - and of the first home county championship fixture, a defeat by Leicestershire despite centuries by Botham and Parker.

The Bearded Wonder, who reckons Riverside and Racecourse among the most attractive anywhere - and Grace Road, Leicester, the ugliest by far - also recalls a memorable Racecourse fixture in which Yorkshire so suddenly and dramatically collapsed they they'd to send out a search party for Mark Robinson, the all-time tail end Charlie.

Robinson was found doing his shopping in the city centre. He got another duck.

The Racecourse will know in November if its won cricket's first beauty contest.

Further North-East nominations - best and worst - are cordially invited here.

Simon Brown would have been hurling them down on that Racecourse learning curve, too. Now he's Durham's beneficiary, which explains a letter from Durham board member Tom Moffatt.

Tom, alas, wanted publicity for an event last Friday - when the column was still East Angling - but makes a valid point, nonetheless.

The average Premiership footballer, he says, earns more in a week or two than a county cricketer does in a year. "Cricketers are still the Cinderellas of professional sport. It's sad, but it isn't a wealthy game."

"Chubby" Brown, who won one England cap, has taken five wickets or more on 36 occasions for the county - almost as many, says Tom, as all other Durham cricketers put together. No doubt of the benefit there, then.

Crab racing? Zoe Birtle, on a working holiday in New South Wales - earning a crustacean, as it were - reports that crab derbies are a weekly highlight at her local bar.

One of the few conditions is that the contestants must be able to fit into the bottom of a half pint glass, except on Melbourne Cup day when the indignity claws doesn't apply.

Zoe, from Billingham, now has one or two of her own in training.

A report in The Observer, while we were away, reckoned crab racing is America's fastest growing sport. "With just a few squirts of water to get them going, they start hauling shell."

Martin Birtle, Zoe's dad, hadn't heard of the water squirting bit. "Hers must be Australian rules," he says.

No offence to The Observer, but the preferred holiday reading at this time of year is the new Durham FA handbook, a treasury of soccer small print.

We can even forgive them for classically misspelling Darlington Grammer School Old Boys, though the alumni themselves may not.

Herein are the Hartlepool Lawyers Sunday League, the Sacriston Aged Miners Cup and the Washington Old People's Trophy. There are Sunderland Saints and Sunderland Silent Night, the North of England Showmen's FC and the Shildon British Railways Orphans.

Particularly, however, our eye is caught by the entry for South Shields Jeff Raine Dairyman FC. Clearly a sponsor who believes in milking it for all its worth.

Awaiting our return, the season's first issue - published before the opening game with Arsenal - of the Boro fanzine Fly Me To The Moon.

"It's a brave new world for the Boro and it could just be the start of something very special," it says.

"Steve McClaren is an absolutely incredible catch for Middlesbrough....his ideas are absolutely leagues ahead of the old school managers; at last someone to unlock the treasure trove door at Hurworth.

"Tell the world - attractive, attacking, crowd pleasing football is making a comeback."

Admittedly, adds FMTTM, it might take a couple of games before everyone is convinced....

Durham Buffs, the team where former FA chief executive Graham Kelly learned how football fortifies the over-50s - and that the first one there puts the nets up - is holding a reunion on September 21.

Kelly, now a director of Luton Town - among much else - is expected to attend.

The club, which these days plays on Ushaw Moor cow field, was formed in 1978.

John Flynn, now chairman of Tow Law Town FC, joined four years later after playing against the Buffs for a Consett side.

"I think they liked the way I tackled," says John, who at 51 continues indelibly to make his mark.

The do is at Durham City cricket club, a night for taking the Buff with the Smooth. Details from Ian Nesbitt, 0191-384-0118.

Richly sponsored, John Flynn will also be striding out in the Great North Run this Sunday - among almost 40 entrants representing Albany Northern League clubs.

Word has it that he's also contemplating an abseil from the Transporter Bridge in Middlesbrough, which is coincidental because a card from veteran long distance walker Brian Hunter in Sedgefield suggests that he plans to mark his 67th birthday in the same hairy way.

The Northern League chairman, unfortunately, will neither be taking part in the Great North Run nor climbing to trepidant heights on the Transporter.

I have a fear of heights and an absolute phobia - the Greeks had a word for it - about high bridges. Barely a mile into the Run, the 167ft high Tyne Bridge could already be one too far.

Instead, the previous day, I plan to walk, jog and very occasionally run the 16 miles from my present home in Middleton Tyas to the spiritual home in Shildon.

Leaving at 9.30am and heading through Barton, Piercebridge and Royal Oak, I aim to be at the dear old Dean Street ground well before kick off in Shildon's FA Cup tie with Brigg Town.

Like all the Northern League's participants, I'm sponsored for Marie Curie Cancer Care and for the HC Pilgrimage Trust, which helps send the sick to Lourdes.

As we did last year, the world's second oldest football league hopes to raise thousands of pounds for charity.

It's not an ideal way to attract sponsors, but these may no longer be 16 mile legs - barely a year ago they weren't 16 yard legs - and donations (cheques to the Northern Football League) would be very much welcomed.

King souls may alternatively care simply to waft a can of Coke en route, or a pint of beer at journey's end. Usual address, even more than usual gratitude.

The player who appeared in the same position in all Bishop Auckland's six FA Amateur Cup final appearances in the 1950s (Backtrack, August 31) was Consett steel worker Jimmy Nimmins.

The Bishops' player whose photograph appeared in a Wembley programme but who never got to play was John Edgar, who turned out subsequently for Ferryhill Athletic and made 12 appearances for Darlington. Whatever happened to him?

Martin Birtle, when not moving sideways, recalls Boro's famous 7-2 win over Chelsea on December 16 1978.

Which famous football personality, he asks, was marking his first game as Chelsea's team boss - and as a Football League manager - that afternoon?

More water under Stamford Bridge on Friday.

Published: Tuesday, September 11, 2001