IT WAS the oldest pub in the county and they turned it into a pint shanty, a public house of horrors. It was a traditional English inn and yet Scottish and Newcastle Breweries transformed it into an Australian theme bar called the Outback - hideous, insidious, the lizard of Oz.

Now a new tenant has not only renamed the Bay Horse in Bishop Auckland but is ripping out every egregious vestige of antipodean excess.

"It was like someone had chopped up a lot of pallets and made a pub out of it," says Chris Ball. "Everywhere was tin sheeting and rough wood. If it looked like that when they did it, what was it going to look like in four years time? Like H block, to be honest."

Now he plans a pyre of the Outback Lager signs - "it cleans out the carby" - the Captain Cook kitsch, kangaroo claptrap and pseudo Billy Tea signs. It will symbolise every other act of historical vandalism by the spendthrift big brewers, truly a bonfire of the inanities.

Chris, Bishop born and bred, became DJ at the Outback four years ago and was subsequently appointed manager. "I ended up doing nothing. I used to sit in the bar all afternoon talking to myself. In the end they offered me the tenancy basically to see if I could do anything with it."

The brewery, it's said, spent £90,000 on deliberately making the place resemble a sheep shearer's shack, aboriginal but by no means best. "There wasn't a straight angle in the place. It's a hell of a job to put right," says George Gallie, the man appointed to the task.

Though the reborn Bay Horse may not be everyone's idea of traditional - there is talk of video walls and DVDs, bubble lamps and music ahead of its time - Chris insists that since the name change three weeks ago, the reaction has been euphoric.

Whatever it is that Australians couldn't give a XXXX for, Bishop lads were only too happy to back out of the Outback.

"I've lost count of the number of people who've shaken me by the hand and said I should be proud of myself. What was wrong with it was that it wasn't the Bay Horse. It was the oldest pub in the county and they totally ruined it. It was absolutely criminal. I've only ever had young 'uns pubs, didn't even know what a domino board was, but I've consulted all the customers over what they want and there'll be something for everyone."

Ironically, many of the "new" fittings - even the curtains, there was "hessian sacking" before - have come from the now closed Blackett's bar in Darlington - another example of corporate brew-haha.

Chris has also spent a day in the Durham County record office researching the pub's history and previous landlords. He plans a "mementoes cabinet" and a list of previous licensees - "like a golf club honours board."

After almost going down under, the Bay Horse, he reckons, can once more be a winner.

LAST week's gentle perambulations around Lynesack and Softley - the Butterknowle area of west Durham - recalled Jossie Allenby (we'd called him Allen) who drank from a half gallon pitcher whilst everyone else made do with half a quart.

Frank Watson in Barnard Castle also remembered him, last encountered over 30 years ago in the Diamond at Butterknowle. We talked, too, of George Henry Wilson and of John Willie Alderson from Baldersdale, whose idea of a holiday was to pedal every night to the Red Lion in Cotherstone.

Jossie, at any rate, was on his way to cut someone's grass and had looked into the pub carrying a sickle. Father Time not otherwise being in attendance, it was another five hours before Frank - the only other customer - was able to leave.

"Jossie was a marvellous character, but I'm afraid that I was scattered whilst he didn't seem affected at all," says Frank, long time secretary of the Barney and District 5s and 3s League.

"Mind," he adds, "I doubt the grass cutting would have had to wait until next day."

ALL that had stemmed from opening Lynesack church's Christmas fair which, with the evening domino drive, raised £1,350. On Saturday, 10am, we'll find a few more well-chosen words at the opening of Richmond Methodists' festive fantasia.

Last week's column also offered copies of the nostalgic CDs of Lynesack and Softley and of Cockfield to the first person to identify the saints to whom the churches at Lynesack and at Woodland are dedicated.

It was thrown into confusion when Michael Heaviside, who compiled the largely photographic CDs on behalf of the Gaunless Valley Historic Trust, rang to say that Woodland didn't have a church at all.

Happily, Connie Everitt knew better, as well she might as she is the Church Councils' secretary. Since she was also the only entry - Lynesack is St John's, Woodland St Mary's - the CDs will be on their way shortly.