Caring for Caitlin helps couple come to terms with their loss

At just 20 months, she is too young to understand that she now lives with her grandparents because of the tragic death of her mother, 20-year-old Rachael Littlefair.

Ms Littlefair was strangled by her 18-year-old boyfriend, Billy Clifton - Caitlin's father - last August.

Since then, Caitlin has been living with Ms Littlefair's parents, Don and Lynn, at Belgrave Street, Darlington, who are in the process of adopting her.

"She keeps me going. It is like Rachael growing up all over again. Some of the things she does, it's just like Rachael was," said Mrs Littlefair. "She is just like her mother."

Although Caitlin is too young to understand, Lynn and Don know she sensed something was wrong after last summer's events.

Her grandmother said: "It is definitely made it easier because she doesn't understand. I think she has missed her mother first of all, and her father."

"She used to say mam a lot," said Mr Littlefair. "We will have to tell her when she is older. It is something we are dreading. It is finding the right time. When do you tell her? When she's 13, 16?"

The strain of the tragedy shows on their faces.

Mr Littlefair said: "We are managing all right. We have to. It is just trying to get over the shock of it. You can't get over it in a couple of months. It is hard."

The couple's other daughter, Kirsty, 18, is also struggling to come to terms with the death of her sister.

"It has been hard on Kirsty. She is still having nightmares," said Mr Littlefair. "She might look all right on the surface, but she is not. She is keeping herself occupied all the time."

Ms Littlefair had been with Clifton for more than two years when he strangled her. The couple lived together, in Darlington's Lanethorpe Crescent, where they were raising their daughter.

Mr Littlefair said they were like any other young couple. "They had arguments like anyone. It is part of life."

Mrs Littlefair said her daughter's choice of partner was liked by the family. "We all got on with Billy," she said.

But now that has all changed.

"I would not like to say what I would do to him if I saw him walking down the street," said Mr Littlefair.

Ms Littlefair remained a key member of the close-knit family, but most of all she was a devoted mother who planned to go back to college to study childcare.

"She loved being a mother. She was bubbly and lively. She liked dancing and singing," said Mr Littlefair.

Mrs Littlefair said: "She used to stand out in a crowd. She was always laughing and joking. Everybody knew her. She was always very friendly, bubbly, always talking to people. She was devoted to her family."

The couple concede their daughter was no angel, but were upset after the court case that not enough mention had been made of the way she had turned her life around after the birth of Caitlin.

Mr Littlefair said his daughter was a typical rebellious teenager.

"Just the usual things kids do," he said. "She didn't like being told what to do, but when she was pregnant she changed completely."

She was presented with a young achiever's award for the way she turned her life around.

Ms Littlefair wanted to help other young people who had been labelled as trouble-makers.

The couple plan to organise their work around Caitlin.

"We will manage," said Mr Littlefair. "She is our grand-daughter. We do not want her going anywhere else. So long as she is with us she will be all right.