Stark Naked (C5)

The Bill (ITV)

There are many things you don't expect to see on TV before the 9pm watershed - and naked skydivers are high on the list.

The not-so-private parts of people leaping out of planes were among an orgy of floppy dangly bits exposed to the elements as the first of this four-part series revealed the antics of people in the UK who like to let it all hang out.

Narrator Esther McVey informed us there are 125,000 card-carrying members of the British Naturist Association. Presumably they have to carry their credentials as they don't have any pockets to put things in.

What the parade of nude people demonstrated once again was that most people - and certainly those who agree to be filmed for TV shows - look better with their clothes on.

Andy loves nothing more than to wander around house and garden naked. When he's not mowing the lawn (being careful where the grass cuttings go), he's jumping out of a plane with equally naked friends Jason and Rosie.

Fortunately it was a sunny day when they went up in an aircraft named Black Beaver (honestly, I didn't make it up), as Andy admitted naked skydiving wasn't so pleasant on chilly days. Something to do with getting frostbite on your equipment, no doubt.

The real danger seemed to be not about making a safe landing but the discomfort caused by having tight straps wrapped between your naked legs. "The chaps come down to earth with a huge adrenaline buzz," we were told. And sore legs too, I bet.

A nude church service in Manchester showed Martin and Eva, together with a small but growing number of Christian naturists, worshipping.

This couple feel that nakedness is next to godliness, and that nudity doesn't mean sex. They intend to stay virgins until they marry.

John Harris, who lives in a place called Papworth Everard (you couldn't make up these names if you tried), aims to live naked as much as he can. The longest he's gone nude is two weeks. He works at home, so wandering around without clothes isn't a problem. One in ten home workers do it in the nude, apparently.

No old film about naturists was complete without a shot of them cooking sausages, so we fully-clothed viewers could have a good laugh as they dodged spitting hot fat. Times have changed - John was shown cooking danger-free pasta.

One of the most dangerous places at present is Sun Hill police station. Things are hotting up in The Bill, and I don't just mean because of the explosion in which half-a-dozen characters were killed off.

The repercussions look like providing the boost that the makers are hoping for to revive the long-running police series. Station superintendent Tom Chandler is shaping up to be dirtier than Den and nastier than Nick now that he's trying to suppress news of his affair with a now-dead detective.