FOR those of us who are not even sure what digital means, the pulling of the ITV Digital plug does not amount to a hill of beans.

The failure to hand over £178m to Nationwide League football clubs, however, is already having serious repercussions in terms of lost jobs and shattered dreams.

Whose fault is it? Undoubtedly there has been bad management, but it is rumoured that the cheating British public might have something to do with it.

The rumour has it that while 1.2 million honest citizens subscribed to ITV Digital, about five times as many found a way to access the pictures without paying for the privilege.

It can be argued that this is no more a crime than cheating footballers conning far more money out of their employers than they are worth.

Perhaps one encourages the other, so that while money makes the world go round impoverished couch potatoes don't feel inclined to shell out to watch overpaid footballers.

I am assuming that the reported interest of York City chairman John Batchelor in buying ITV Digital can be taken with a pinch of salt. While not naming his partners, he says the deal will be heavily funded from motorsport. But at a time when Eddie Jordan has just announced 40 redundanices from his Formula One team, this doesn't quite ring true.

This is a sad situation on all counts, but the digital demise will be a blessing in disguise if it helps to persuade the watchers to be more active and the footballers to accept their true worth.

EVERYONE at Arsenal, of course, will think they are worth £100,000 a week once they have completed the double.

They weren't good enough to reach the Champions League quarter-finals, but it will be the second domestic double in four years for the Bergkamps and the Vieiras.

Those of us of a certain age remember when Tottenham were the first team to do the double for donkeys' years in 1961. I can still remember the line-up: Brown, Baker, Henry, Blanchflower, Norman, McKay, Dyson, Allen, Smith, White, Jones.

It always seemed to be the same team and what plain, ordinary British names they were. Two weeks after Arsenal have beaten Chelsea in the FA Cup final I doubt if I'll be able to name more than a couple of their team. Oh yes, they have a Henry as well, don't they? IN these parts it is not advisable to speak out against the play-offs as they again brought a little end-of-season excitement for Hartlepool. But I'm wondering what kind of war might break out in East Anglia if Norwich succeed in replacing a far superior Ipswich side in the Premiership.

It will be worse than the Black Country skirmishing after West Brom came from 11 points behind Wolves with two months of the season left to condemn their neighbours to the play-offs.

Despite their late implosion, Wolves still finished 11 points ahead of Norwich, yet they had to suffer the indignity of losing to the Canaries in the play-offs.

While Wolves estimate their failure to reach the Premiership has cost them £20m, it also meant more agony for Alex Rae. His former Sunderland teammates were dumped out of the FA Cup by West Brom, and he has now suffered play-off heartache with Millwall, Sunderland and Wolves.

WHEN once asked why he was using a new putter, the American golfer Craig Stadler replied that it was because the old one didn't float.

Despite once winning the Masters, he is best remembered for missing a two-foot putt to win a 1985 Ryder Cup match, and in such circumstances who wouldn't be tempted to send the putter to a watery grave? Golf balls, of course, don't float either, which is why millions of them around the world are retrieved from lakes and re-sold, giving golfers access to cheaper balls.

This has become standard practice, yet when John Collinson was found wearing wet suit and flippers with 1,158 balls retrieved from a lake at a Leicestershire golf club he was prosecuted and jailed for six months.

It seems he will now be released on bail pending appeal, in which he will have the support of golfers from all over the world, who will without exception consider our legal system stark, staring bonkers.

A FEW weeks ago I raged about the campaign called Here.Now, which purports to use people like Elton John and Ian Wright to promote greater confidence in the North East.

Now as I drive around the region I see Wright's face staring out at me from promotional posters. Am I alone in finding this utterly outrageous? If not, please bombard me with your support in a campaign to get this nonsense halted forthwith.

Published: 03/05/2002