The Bishop of Durham regrets, but the diocesan clergy cricket team transgresses (shall we say) as greatly now as when he arrived eight years ago.

"It is one of my great failures, though I think there are many," says the Rt Rev Michael Turnbull with due humility.

Diocesan clergy play for the Church Times Cup. Durham, despite the column's patronage and the Bishop's prayers, have never recently got past the qualifying stage.

"I have tried to import opening batsmen from other dioceses, ordained priests who told me they were good leg spinners, consecrated linseed oil and said my prayers for them but all to no avail," he says.

Bishop Michael, born in Ilkley and a useful all rounder as a young priest in York, announced his retirement during the lunch interval in Saturday's Test Match Special from Headingley - the ground where his love of cricket was nurtured when watching test matches with his father.

He also told Christopher Martin Jenkins that he had "nearly got the sack" after running out the suffragan Bishop of St Albans in successive matches.

"It seemed a neat way of doing it. Cricket has been part of my life for a long time and I didn't want to be too pompous about it," he says.

Though the announcement at the end of the interview appeared to take everyone by surprise, it had been planned for months - with the Backtrack column in on it since Thursday.

"We have to go through quite a lot of protocol to announce a retirement. When I told 10 Downing Street that I was going to do it on Test Match Special they just said '"Pardon'?" said Bishop Michael.

Martin Jenkins might ask, he mused, whether he managed to match much cricket. "I might tell him that it's not as much as I'd like, but now...."

Our first chat, shortly after the announcement of his appointment, had also been mainly about cricket (and his team of clerical under-achievers.)

"Once I arrive I shall be a Durham supporter, not a Yorkshireman," he'd said in 1994 and has been as good as his word - he now supports Sunderland, too.

What, though, if the Riverside got Test status at the expense of his beloved Headingley? "I'd be delighted if Durham got Test matches, they've done much better with international matches than Yorkshire and I think they deserve it.

"I wouldn't want to see Yorkshire lose it because I have great affection for them, but Durham have worked miracles in the past ten years from being a fairly minor Minor County to one of the best grounds in the country.

"Yorkshire seem to go constantly from one argument to another. I think there are some fairly stubborn personalities around there."

He retires on April 30 next year, when he will be 67. "It gets Easter over," says Bishop Michael, "and it's also the start of the crickst season...."

At Consett v Pontefract Colliers on Saturday - road to Cardiff, first 200 yards - we bumped into another sporting clergyman. The Rev Leo Osborn, chairman of the Newcastle Methodist district and Albany Northern League chaplain, is on a diet so strict that he even foreswears his beloved ginger beer.

Happily, he says, Saturday is a "day of grace". Happily, too, Consett do a very canny pie....

Pontefract's manager, incidentally, is 45-year-old Peter Daniel, capped seven times at England Under 21 level and in the Sunderland side which lost 1-0 to Norwich in the 1985 Milk Cup final.

Manager of Lincoln City when in 1987 they became the first club automatically to be relegated from the fourth division, he's in his second spell in what the Consett programme termed "the Skinner Lane hot seat."

Last season they were bottom of the Northern Counties East League second division, on Saturday they lost 4-1. For Skinner Lane read lions den.

Since there's not been much transfer news to talk about, the Sunderland fanzine A Love Supreme conducted an Internet poll to find the club's "coolest" ever player.

Scotsman Billy Hughes was third, local hero Gary Rowell second. Peter Daniel didn't muster any votes; the single person who nominated Billy Whitehurst was deemed "a very sad man."

Coolest by amany a frozen mile, however, was central defender Gary Bennett, who made almost 340 appearances in the colours but may still be best remembered for putting workie-ticket David Speedie into the Clock Stand paddock.

Benno, formerly manager of Darlington and last seen in Durham City's defence, is keen to defrost his success. "Obviously a lot of supporters who know me know that I never wear socks.

"It's important in terms of cool."

Hugo Viana, number 45 at Newcastle United, has the highest squad number of any outfield player in the Premiership, a survey reveals. Viana's still up the order, however, compared to fourth choice Leeds Untied goalkeeper Darren Southern. Should he ever get a game, he'll appear as number 50.

Today's Eating Owt column tucks into the Race Riders Cafe at Middleham, co-owned by leading trainer Mark Johnston - only the second man to saddle 100 winners in nine successive seasons - and featured in last Friday's Racing Post.

Among those who also looked in for a coffee was the indefatigable Raye Wilkinson, Racing Welfare's man in the North for the past 24 years and the brains behind the "Lifetime in Racing" series in which races are named after unaung heroes with over 40 years service to the business.

The latest, at Ripon on Friday, honours 86-year-old retired stud groom Roger Murray from Middleham, who also spent six years as a navigator with Bomber Command.

Johnston, incidentally, denies that he's diversifying to make ends meet - "I just about keep the wolf from the door," says the canny Scot - but may soon have another string to the family bow, anyway.

His wife Deirdre has won a competition in Horse and Hound (of all things) to take part in a penalty shoot-out before a Manchester United v Liverpool match.

"I'm giving her extra training," he says.

Several members of Bishop Auckland's great Amateur Cup winning teams of the 1950s are expected to attend tomorrow's funeral of the legendary Harry Sharratt, the showman goalkeeper who died last Monday. It's at Tunstall parish church, near Kirby Lonsdale in Cumbria, at 10 30am.

...and finally

After last week's trip to the cricket at Colchester we sought the identity of the Durham player who hit a century when the county last visited the Essex town in 1999. It was Jimmy Daley, sadly departing.

Since we have been discussing episcopal cricketers, readers may recall the Rev David Sheppard who averaged 37.80, including three centuries, in 22 matches for England. But of which city did he become bishop?

We shall see what we shall see on Friday.

Published: 27/08/2002