IT'S enough to give you the sheikhs. Among the people I'd never heard of suddenly making the headlines are Peter Enckelman, Miles Maclagan and Sheikh Ahmed bin Mohammed al Maktoum.
The first two could be described as hapless, while the 16-year-old sheikh, a member of the family who rule Dubai, wants for nothing. No expense was spared in ensuring he won the 100-mile event at the World Endurance Riding Championships in Jerez, Spain.
Two more sheikhs failed to complete the course, so they didn't win the team prize in an event which is run in four loops. After each loop the horses are thoroughly checked, but two of them still had to be put down. And people say foxhunting is cruel.
A few Aston Villa fans might have thought Enckelman, their goalkeeper, should be put down after he was adjudged to have helped the ball hilariously into his net following a throw-in. His name has now displaced Barthez from the English language as a synonym for enormous blunder.
Replays suggest he didn't touch the ball so, rather perversely, the greater sin of missing it entirely meant the goal should not have stood.
Enckelman still looked a berk, however, and it is to be hoped that Maclagan makes far less of a fool of himself this weekend.
Standing 574th in tennis's world rankings, he is in Britain's Davis Cup squad along with those other giants of the game, Martin Lee and Arvind Parmar.
Tim Henman may have a wimpish demeanour, but he can muster rather more bulldog spirit than the converted Canadian Greg Rusedski, who has pulled out through injury while the signs are Tim will at least defy his shoulder problem to take part.
Two years ago Rusedski retired with a foot injury after losing the first rubber of the Davis Cup tie against Ecuador, for whom brothers Nicolas and Giovanni Lapentti swept to victory.
This time we face two more brothers in Thailand's Paradorn and Narathorn Srichapan, prompting the thought that Henman should be out to stud in the hope that his offspring can improve our credibility in this family affair. The sheiks would know all about that.
IT was almost a family affair when Middlesex played Lancashire on Sunday. Robin Weston, son of a former British Lion, must have felt like the poor relation with Compton and Hutton in the team, while the opposition included Kyle Hogg, grandson of West Indian spin bowling legend Sonny Ramadhin.
Nick Compton and Ben Hutton, progeny of famous grandfathers, came together at 52 for five and put on an unbroken 142 in 23 overs. And now Middlesex are keen to bring another famous name to Lord's in Mali Richards, son of Sir Viv, who has finished his studies at Cheltenham College.
NEWCASTLE seem to have lost their sparkle since leaving out Lomana LuaLua. Sir Bobby is said to have taken umbrage when the cartwheeling youngster disappeared to play for the Congo, as he did when Nolberto Solano played for Peru.
The Democratic Republic of Congo may not amount to a hill of beans in world football, but any man should have the right to represent his country without fear of being relegated to the stiffs back home.
While Craig Bellamy is feeling his way back, it would be good to see LuaLua returning to light up tomorrow's Tyne-Wear derby, which is otherwise likely to be clouded by the fear of defeat.
It will also be clouded by the threat of tribal warfare, as witnessed in the Birmingham v Villa match when CS canisters and billiard balls in socks were among the items confiscated by police.
That is presumably why Darlington boss Tommy Taylor played down the build-up to the Hartlepool match.
If it backfired by demotivating the players, that's a sad indictment of their professionalism.
YORKSHIRE'S transition from champs to chumps was confirmed this week when they fielded an attack which included non-contracted teenager Nick Thornicroft.
This is another astonishing example of cricket's escalating injury problems as the Tykes began the season with the strongest battery of seam bowlers in the country, namely Gough, Hoggard, Silverwood, Sidebottom, Kirby, White, Hamilton and Bresnan.
Meanwhie Essex, one of the counties replacing Yorkshire in the top flight, do not possess a paceman worthy of the name, adding to the impression that three up, three down is a nonsense.
Yorkshire will surely bounce straight back - providing half of their seamers stay upright.
Published: 20/09/2002
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