A bit belatedly - "you were on holiday again," he protests - Thornton Watlass cricket club chairman Goff Weatherall reports a possibly unique instance of father and son hitting a century in the same innings.
Thornton Watlass is the village near Bedale where the pub wall forms one short boundary and sundry other local rules grow tall around the green.
This was at Studley Royal, however - "a big big ground, is Studley" - where Chris Nicholson hit 113 not out and his 18-year-old son Tim 100, sharing in a 164 third wicket stand.
It helped Watlass to promotion by one point from Nidderdale division six and prompts the inevitable question of whether it's been done before. Mr Jack Chapman may be thumbing his record books already.
In the matter of chips and old blocks, however, none plays the generation game as distinctively as Bulldog Billy Teesdale.
Though the Bulldog himself no longer wears whites - explanations range from beriberi to bubonic plague, depending upon which untruth lies first in wait - the whelp line continues.
At Evenwood CC's presentation on Saturday, young Billy not only took the first team "players' player" award but the Under 18s trophies for both batting and bowling.
"He even glares down the wicket like his dad," said his Uncle Alf, proudly.
James Alderson and Lee Foster, both still juniors, also went home with arms full of awards.
As if all that weren't enough, the Bulldog also learned last week that former Evenwood pro Nixon McLean is to be one of Somerset's overseas players next season, thus sparking a Co Durham stampede for country membership at Taunton.
"I gave him his start," said Billy, with unexpected modesty.
We also learned at the presentation do that club chairman Kevin Richardson is helping produce a CD of the Evenwood twang, out in time for Christmas. It'll be called "Divvent Taak See Fond" and could be a biography of Bulldog Billy.
Over the boundary at Evenwood FC, a new assistant manager has been added to the Appliance of Science squad.
Team boss Ken Houlahan, more degrees than a first form protractor, has been joined by Alan Fothergill, a nutritionist.
Ken, a sports science lecturer at Sunderland University, insists that in dietary terms burger all will change, however.
"This isn't Arsenal it's the Northern League second division," he adds. "I know my limitations."
Called One Night At the Palace, a reference to M. Cantona's infamous kung-fu class, former Premiership referee Alan Wilkie's autobiography was published last week.
It's a chronological account of the Chester-le-Street lad's life as a middle man but - slow reader - the column must for now content itself with an early days account.
For his second game in the Northern League, says Alan, he was sent to Blyth v Ferryhill, after the near-invincible Spartans had reached the FA Cup fifth round against Wrexham.
After just ten minutes he awarded Ferryhill a penalty. Hell on amnd Blyth's Tommy Dixon booked. Even the visiting captain asked if he were sure.
Though Blyth finally won 2-1, they marked the newcomer one out of ten and told "inimitable" Northern League secretary Gordon Nicholson that they didn't want to see the lad again.
Then as now, Old Nic wasn't a man to be pushed about. The book records that Wilkie was sent to referee five more Blyth home matches that season - and Gordon, inimitable as ever, disagrees.
His records show that Alan's second match was Blyth v Billingham Synners, that it ended 1-1, that Blyth gave the ref eight out of ten - not one - and that the man in black darkened their door just once more all season.
Cricketing cleric David Sheppard, mentioned hereabouts just a few weeks ago, has also published his autobiography - and with the authorised version (as it were) of the Fred Trueman story.
Fiery Fred, it will be recalled, is supposed to have been so incensed at the young curate's inability to hold onto catches that he made a brusque Yorkshire remark about keeping his hands together more often.
Lord Sheppard, a former Bishop of Liverpool, tells it differently. It was the last Gentlemen v Players match when Peter Parfitt was dismissed by a fine Sheppard catch at short leg.
Trueman commiserated in the pavilion. "Never mind Peter, lad, the Reverend must have a better chance than most of us when he puts his hands together."
* Steps Along Hope Street by David Sheppard. (Hodder and Stoughton, £17 99.)
The only Shildon footballer ever to win an amateur international cap - and the first batsman, he insists, to score a century at North Bitchburn - rang yesterday.
"I'll be 80 in January," reports Bobby Davison, born in Kimblesworth, near Chester-le-Street, but long in the old Nottinghamshire coalfield.
Crook Town's centre half in the epic, twice replayed 1954 Amateur Cup final, he's undergone 12 eye operations ("hereditary"), has trouble with his feet - "too much kicking leather footballs" - but remains in excellent spirits.
Being a northern lad, he only did win one cap - "but if I live to be 180," says Bobby. "I'll treasure it for ever."
Reports continue of former Carlisle United supreme Michael Knighton in George Reynolds's company, even visiting George's old school haunts in Worcestershire - the place where he worked with the pigs.
The Darlington chairman is happy to confirm them. "I don't know anyone who's suffered a bigger miscarriage of justice in football than Michael - apart from me, of course," he says.
George's life story is nearing completion, meanwhile - "Mike Knighton gets a mention, so do you" - and may even be launched before the new stadium.
"The stadium's absolutely flying ahead, going on big style," says the man who dug the foundations. Whilst a Christmas finish is possible, it won't stage matches until August.
The book, quite a story, could run to several volumes. The working title - George Reynolds: the Millionaire Safecracker - just about sums it up.
Brooks Mileson, much involved with Michael Knighton when Carlisle United was for sale, looked in yesterday with news of Amos the Ostrich, being reared on his Cumbrian homestead.
Brooks is chairman of the Peterlee based Albany Group, the young bird is named after the chairman of the Albany Northern League.
"It's the best looking ostrich I've seen in my life," says Brooks. We are back to chips and old blocks.
And finally...
The number of overseas born players who kicked off in this season's Premiership (Backtrack, October 4) was 101 out of 220.
Brian Shaw in Shildon today seeks the identity of the only two England players who started each of the first games under Hoddle, Keegan and Eriksson.
Should today's birthday pass uneventfully, the column returns on Friday.
Published: 08/10/2002
Comments: Our rules
We want our comments to be a lively and valuable part of our community - a place where readers can debate and engage with the most important local issues. The ability to comment on our stories is a privilege, not a right, however, and that privilege may be withdrawn if it is abused or misused.
Please report any comments that break our rules.
Read the rules hereComments are closed on this article