All dressed up and nowhere to live.

Half a million pounds will buy you a Grade II listed farmhouse with five acres in Suffolk, a seven-bedroom family house in Birmingham, or a luxury penthouse development in Bristol. Unfortunately Sara, newly-arrived back from Hong Kong, wanted to live in London.

So, no grand houses for her. Just a two-bedroom flat, which caused headaches for our favourite TV property hunters Phil Spencer and Kirstie Allsopp in Location, Location, Location. The most interesting things they had to show us were Kirstie's red high-heel shoes which was fine for those of us who watch not to find a des-res but to see Kirstie stride into other people's homes and tell them to knock down walls.

An added problem was Sara's insistence that her mansion block flat had good feng shui. It couldn't be north facing or on a busy road. No wonder that Kirstie and Phil couldn't find anything that appealed to her in one of the world's most expensive cities. So they suggested something more expensive - a cool £200,000 above her declared £500,000 budget. The extra itself was more than the average price of a home in this country.

Sara didn't find a home, but radiographer David Keith did move into a new pad in Faking It - a live/work space in a converted shoe factory in Hackney. "It's not finished," he observed, walking down the bare brick corridors.

But the place was complete and his home for a month while top photographer Stuart Weston tried to turn him into a fashion photographer. A man earned a living taking pictures of people's insides was going to be taught to take pictures from the outside.

As David came from the country - Gloucestershire - people tended to be patronising about him discovering life in a big city, and tutor Weston reduced him to tears at one point. "Don't argue with me, I'm trying to help you," he said, scolding his pupil.

It didn't seem very kind, either, to invite David's girlfriend on the set the very day he was photographing scantily-clad girls. Were the makers hoping she'd get jealous and have a row with him on camera?

David's advisors also rejected his clean cut look and clothes. One didn't like his trousers, saying there was "no atmosphere going on in them". He had to have a spikey haircut, grow stubble on his face, and wear his jeans on his hips to make him look the part of a hip, young fashion photographer.

Girlfriend Vicky was not over-impressed. "He looks a bit scruffy," she said with as much enthusiasm as property-hunter Sara as she rejected flat after flat.