It's almost 50 years, so they reckon, since anyone from the North Yorkshire market town of Leyburn appeared in the Football League.
Harry Walker - birthplace officially listed as Aysgarth, a few meandering miles up the dale - made 50 appearances for Darlington, was in the Portsmouth side which thrashed Wolves in the 1939 FA Cup final, kept green-jerseyed goal for Nottingham Forest in 250 games between 1947-54.
Save that he would now be 86, we have completely been unable to discover what happened to him. Readers may, as usual, know better.
Now Leyburn, latterly best known for slightly lurid stories about the lady and the tramp, boasts three current Football League stars - and all from the same comfortably detached house.
Andrew Dawson, 24, shines at Scunthorpe and played for them at Wembley, his 21-year-old brother Kevin sits comfortably in Chesterfield's good books.
Mike Dawson, 19 on Monday, hit the headlines the following day when called for training with the full England squad after just 15 first team matches.
Tabloids which two weeks ago linked the 6ft 3in central defender with a £3m bid from Manchester United now trumpet his value at £8m - "the new Rio Ferdinand," said the Star.
"Ignore it," says his dad.
It's just newspaper talk, adds Stuart Dawson. They don't take a blind bit of notice and wouldn't want to put pressure on him, anyway.
His manager says he wouldn't sell for £10m, his agent got involved, too.
The youngest brother, stupendous in the air, keeps feet on the ground and a new five-year contract in his pocket.
Half a century after Harry Walker became a legend there, Mike's at Nottingham Forest, too - as, preceding him, were his brothers. Both asked for transfers to have a better chance of regular first team football, and before Nottingham Forest became Dawson City.
"To us they're of equal ability and equally brilliant," says Yvonne, their mum.
"I never really wanted a little girl, all their lives they've just been so good for one another."
Yvonne's a secretary at the school down the road where she and Stuart met, he's a civil servant at Catterick Garrison - "the Camp", as everyone thereabouts still calls it.
Stuart played both football and rugby at county schools level, was on Manchester United's books as a 14-year-old - "George Best's era" - when he broke his leg playing rugby.
"It was two years before it was ever properly right and by then it was too late," says Stuart, 45.
"I went to Newcastle United after that but it was never the same. I never settled, they were all Geordies up there. At Manchester United the youngsters were from all over the country."
Instead he played centre forward for Leyburn United, dropped back to centre half, ended up in goal.
"We'd be having team talks in the dressing room and there'd be footballs flying all over the place from those three.
"They wanted to kick a ball as soon as they could walk," Stuart recalls.
Usually, though, the impressionable bairns were in Liverpool shirts. "We had a big garden with a goal in it and it was just lovely watching them.
"Playing football was all they ever wanted to do," says Yvonne.
Mum's taxi, meanwhile, was clocking up hundreds of miles to junior games.
"I loved every minute of it," she insists. "We met such lovely people."
Andrew was a nine-year-old at Northallerton Town when spotted by Brian Emery, Forest's assiduous Teesside-based scout.
When he learned that there were two more like him at home, Emery became even more anxious that they join the fraternity.
It wasn't a case of babes in the wood, however, more adolescents at the Forest.
"The club was absolutely brilliant, we just can't speak too highly of them," says Yvonne. "Right from the start, we knew that they were safe."
Mum and dad are determined to retain a low profile, nonetheless, in need of persuasion to talk even to the Darlington and Stockton Times, the hand on heart bible in those parts.
They have kept, for all that, the Daily Star which described their Mike as the next Rio Ferdinand - "the only thing that will change is that it will widen even further the smile that's always on his face," said Forest manager Paul Hart after the England announcement - and the Sky Sports recording after his call-up.
Sky, predictably, dubbed him the Boy Wonder. Hart talked of the youngster who was always tall and skinny but clearly had something special - "not least that he's an extremely nice boy" - and has formed an impressive defensive partnership with the veteran Des Walker, 37 yesterday.
Nick Marshall, Forest's academy director, spoke of the sort of boy any club would want.
"He came to us at 13 and hasn't changed - down to earth, super lad, can't remember him once causing us a problem. Everybody will be absolutely delighted."
Sky Sports still murmurs in the parental lounge, lest there be any more news of the family.
"The kids have always been close, never any jealousy, backed each other all the way," says Yvonne. "They'll have been on the phone to each other tonight as they are every night; they're not just brothers, they're best mates and they're all doing absolutely wonderfully."
For his birthday on Monday they bought the youngest son some Lottery tickets.
It seemed somehow superfluous. Mike Dawson, last among equals, is hitting the jackpot already.
Backtrack briefs
Britain's best domino team - and that, as they say, is official - defends its title and its proud reputation tomorrow.
The Grey Horse, next to Darlington railway station, has won the national 5s and 3s singles championship twice in the past three years, eternally knocking the notion that dominoes is purely a game of luck.
"There's an element of luck but my pat answer is that it's about how you play a bad hand - any silly bugger can play a good 'un," said 69-year-old Derrick White, among the ever-presents.
Tomorrow's programme contains a "Champions of champions" table, based on finals appearances since they began, always at Bridlington Spa, in 1985.
The Grey Horse, three times singles winners, heads teams like the Hillbillies from Telford, the Gardeners Retreat in Stoke-on-Trent and - in at number eight - the Cumby Arms from Heighington, between Darlington and Bishop Auckland.
Tomorrow's 64 finalists also include Busters in Darlington, Longlands Club in Middlesbrough and the New Masons, bless their fancy aprons, in Shildon.
Derrick, lovely feller, spent six teenage years in the Friarage Hospital in Northallerton with a TB related illness, picked up dominoes on his release and has had his feet under the table ever since.
He's joined at the Grey Horse, ante-post favourites, by his younger brother Tony and nephew Mark, brothers Alan and Colin Stainsby, Tony Renshaw and our old friend Stormin' Noman Kent, the pride of Aycliffe Village.
Since the column has never progressed beyond the brainless Britannia B team in division D of the Darlington and District League, it seemed time for a challenge match.
"A fun game," we suggested.
"Blow that, my honour's at stake," said Derrick, who swears - "teach 'em the hard way" - that he even plays seriously against the grandbairns.
It should therefore be reported that after the first leg he was 1-0 down - home advantage, an' all - and that the two-finger gesture after the second was neither a victory sign nor the other thing, merely an indication of the latest score.
We essayed a third leg, and - a bit late for Brid - must probably play the White man more often. Champions of Britain 0 Brainless Britannia B 3.
The Stockton West End FC newsletter reports that Jonathan Kamara, manager of the newly-formed Under 11s side, left his wife in labour in order to watch their opening game, against North Ormesby. Sadly for the expectant father, the travails continued on the pitch. Daddy of all defeats, they lost 17-1.
Mention of former Sunderland and Middlesbrough centre half Dickie Rooks in Tuesday's column stirred several memories, not least of his spell as coach at Esh Winning.
John Briggs recalled not just Dickie's time as a Roker Park junior - still working as a builder, had a kick about with his mates wearing fur boots and swimming trunks - but a hat-trick against Sheffield Wednesday whilst playing centre half for the Boro.
Despite it, Boro lost 5-3 (or possibly 6-4.) How many centre halves have scored three and ended up on the losing side, asks John - and who can remember the circumstances?
Still with Sunderland, one of Paul Dobson's colleagues was visiting his old dad in a Swansea hospital the other day when introduced to Roker legend Trevor Ford, recovering in the next bed from a mild stroke.
Sunderland paid Aston Villa £29,500 for the Welshman in 1950, sold him three years later to Cardiff City for the same sum - which remained an incoming Roker record until 1970.
Ford - "I'm tempted to call him Mr Ford," says Paul - hit three on his debut against Sheffield Wednesday and uprooted a Fulwell End post with another shot.
He won 38 Welsh caps, scored a record 23 goals and was 79 last month. Stroke notwithstanding, says our informant, he looked good for a canny while yet.
And finally...
The former Seaham Red Star goalkeeper who has kept goal in the Champions League this season (Backtrack, November 19) is Steve Harper of Newcastle United.
So who's the Horden lad, still in the Premiership at 35, presently sidelined by a heel injury said to have started when he was wearing in new shoes?
Foot in the door again on Tuesday
Published: 22/11/2002
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