D is for DRINK and DRUGS

Now it can be told... the time when Senior Son, aged 14, told me he was going camping up the dales for the bank holiday weekend and instead went to Richmond Meet and drank ten pints of lager before eleven o'clock in the morning...

We fished him out of A&E at the Duchess of Kent Hospital. "He hasn't had a stomach pump," said the weary doctor.

"Shame," I said, brutally.

Did it teach him a lesson? Of course not. We grounded him for weeks - but then he went on a school trip to the Coronation St experience and got no further than the Rover's Return.

There is a theory, widely expounded, that if you bring your children up to have the occasional shandy or wine and water at home, they will learn to respect alcohol and to drink, if at all, sensibly and moderately.

Tosh.

However sensibly you bring up your sons, at least 90 per cent of them will go out in their early teens and throw far too much booze down their necks and probably straight back up again. Just ask Tony Blair.

While we worry about drugs - and yes, there is a problem with drugs - the problem with drink is probably far worse, partly because we don't realise how bad it is and don't take it seriously enough. Because we like a drink ourselves, it's easy to laugh it off and remember our own teenage disasters.

But this lot are starting younger and drinking more. Those kids sitting in the park with the cheap cider are probably 12 years old. By the time they're celebrating their GCSEs they've long since left alcopops behind them and are hitting the vodka - along with strong lager, wine, anything with a bright colour and a daft name - all in the course of the same evening. They are drinking enormous amounts of booze on a regular basis.

And then we wonder why boys get into fights and girls get into trouble. And town centres turn into no-go areas every Friday night.

By the time he'd got to 17, Senior Son had grown out of one of his favourite drinking places, "too full of kids" he said dismissively.

A friend took photos of her 14-year-old son and took them round all the pubs in town, warning landlords, "this boy is seriously underage". It made no difference. Another used to shove her son in an icy cold shower when he came home the worse for wear. That didn't do much good either.

You can ground them, stop their allowance, tie them to a table leg. But still, once they're out again they'll just go and make up for all they've missed.

As for drugs... the world has moved on far and fast since the Turn In, Turn On, Drop Out, hippy-dippy Sixties. Older teenagers don't keep awake clubbing all night just by drinking coffee. Everything is available everywhere, "but it might take an hour to two to get hold of heroin", Senior Son cheerfully informed me.

Although there are horror stories and tragedies involving drugs, the big difference is that most youngsters - even those that use them - realise that drugs can be dangerous, even if not as dangerous as adults try to make out.

They don't believe that of drink.

Not since the days of Gin Lane ("drunk for a penny, dead drunk for tuppence") have so many people drunk so much so young. Goodness knows what the long term affects will be. And that's even before they get behind the wheel of a car.

Published: 12/12/2002