Back to school, or at least to Darlington Sixth Form College, we were invited last Thursday to present the annual sports awards. They'd done awfully well.

The college is the former Queen Elizabeth Grammar School. The Victorian hall in which the presentations took place has stained glass, an organ in the loft and bats, properly protected, in the belfry.

Everything else has changed. Today's sixth formers wear studs in many other places than their football boots, sport messages on the front of their T-shirts which in the 1960s we weren't even allowed to think, and far from arriving cap- in-hand for the honours, in some cases left caps on their heads.

Almost 100 of the college's 1,500 full-time students were among the achievers, the volleyball team British colleges champions and the swimmers North-East champions and fourth nationally.

We told George Reynolds stories, like the time back in 1972 when he booked Peters and Lee for £10 at the GR Club in Shildon and wouldn't give them another penny, though they'd reached number one in the interim.

Sixth sensible, they laughed and listened. There are lessons to be learned from George.

For a memorable 90 minutes the following day, the aforesaid GR - once a raggy-arsed dyslexic from Sunderland - met Mackenzie Thorpe, raggy-arsed dyslexic from South Bank.

Both are now mutli-millionaires; George from worktops, Mackenzie from painting. George lives in Witton-le-Wear; Mackenzie, back to launch his "Game of Life" football exhibition, lives in San Francisco.

The meeting was at Darlington's handsome new stadium. Though it probably wouldn't do to reveal all that took place, they also share a belief in the biblical tenet that a prophet is not without honour, save in his own country.

Where they diverge is that in George's company it's impossible to buy the drinks, or anything else at all. Recently flown home, Mackenzie was rather different in the pub afterwards. "I only have dollars," he said.

Last Wednesday's paper reported that top ticket prices in the new stadium would be £23m, prompting season ticket holder Richard Jones to wonder if it weren't a little overpriced. Perhaps the millions weren't missing, just mislaid. Friday's paper reported that Sunderland had signed four-goal Tore Andre Flo from Rangers "in a deal worth around £8." It was spotted by Tom Purvis, also in Sunderland. "I wonder if we got any change," he asks.

On Friday evening to Trimdon Juniors' annual extravaganza at Ramside Hall, where in expectation of a presentation to the club's most famous old boy we'd been asked to write a Colin Cooper encomium for the menu card.

John Burton - now Tony Blair's agent, once head of PE at Sedgefield Comp - recalled that Coops wasn't just a talented midfielder in those days, but a natural athlete.

"As an 11-year-old he ran a mile in just over five minutes, which was quite amazing," said John. "It must have been near enough a world record for his age.

"He was also the shortest boy in the school team. He must have grown two feet since then."

A quarter of a century and two England caps later, Colin still has to do as he's told, which explains why, early to bed for the Boro match on Sunday, he couldn't make the dinner after all.

John Burton, who promises on these occasions always to offer up a note for the column, reveals that his 50th birthday present to the Prime Minister was almost upstaged.

John arranged for a Newcastle United shirt to be signed by Alan Shearer; the Spanish prime minister sent a Real Madrid shirt signed by the entire team.

The agent knows his man, however. "Tony was delighted with my present," he says. "One Alan Shearer is worth 11 Real Madrid any day."

Malcolm Fallow, deputy principal of East Durham and Houghall Community College, beetled across at the Trimdon dinner with a copy of the college's latest "Sunderland" ad.

The series began famously with "Some people think college courses are even harder than Kevin Ball". Another about Alan Shearer not being fit to lace Kevin Phillips' boots was withdrawn after complaints to the Sunderland fanzine A Love Supreme.

This one's headed "The failure to adequately replace major assets is a recipe for disaster" above photographs of former Sunderland stars like Ball, Niall Quinn, Lee Clark and Michael Bridges.

"Knowledge is your major asset," it adds. "Replenish your stocks at the Community College."

Malcolm, whose own football career chiefly embraced Blackhall CW, is delighted with it. "It may not be the traditional way for a college to attract students," he says, "but it certainly seems to be effective."

Another meeting of old friends on Sunday evening, when Whitby Town FC chairman Graham Manser - bearing a set of worn football strips - had an Auld Lang Syne beer with Gretna secretary Ron McGregor.

The clubs became friends at opposite extremes of the Northern League. Now Gretna, at last in the Scottish League, are trying to collect 1,000 strips, or shirts, to send to the South African townships.

"They could be old team colours or shirts that children have grown out of," says Ron. "Football is growing fast in the townships; they get really excited about this sort of thing."

Whitby gave shirts from the well remembered days of Arnott Insurance sponsorship, but not the Wembley kit from the 1997 FA Vase final. "No chance," says the chairman, "we're keeping those for ever."

* Helped by other Scottish League clubs, Gretna are about halfway towards their target. Shirts off your backs, we'll happily act as a collecting point for other contributions.

In recording Witton Park Rose and Crown's 100 per cent season the other day, we suggested that 12-0 and 13-1 victories over The Comedian from Sunniside had left the losers with little to laugh about. "We had, we scored first in the 13-1," writes Sunniside secretary Lol Cullinan. Unfortunately, he adds, the lead only lasted two minutes.

...and finally

Among the many (no doubt) remarkable things about Friday's column was that we forgot to pose a question.

Racing fans may instead care to name the only horse to have won the Aintree, Welsh and Scottish Nationals.

Up and over again on Friday.

Published: 13/05/2003