Ken Houlahan, he who brought the appliance of science to Evenwood Town, led his team to the Craven Cup final at Horden - cold as Christmas - on Tuesday night. The experiment is working.
They played the Colliers of Ashington, whose vociferous fans may be the only barmy army which identifies itself by a post code: "Sing NE63, yeah, sing NE63."
Also in attendance was Evenwood programme editor the Rev Frank Campbell, a Church of Scotland minister who left home near Jedburgh at 5.35pm and was at Horden in time for the 7pm kick-off.
"It says nothing in the Good Book about speeding," he insisted.
Ken Houlahan, it will be recalled, has more degrees than a first form protractor - mainly in sports-related disciplines. His approach to Evenwood Town is what a scientist might call holistic.
The whole community has become involved, the cricket and running clubs embraced within a Local Sports Partnership which aims to attract major funding to improve facilities.
"It's much broader than football, it's about sport and exercise for the whole community," says Ken, in his unpaid position for a year.
"When I came we had four players, nee money, nee committee, nee nowt," he adds, as a Co Durham lad might.
Evenwood also reached the Craven Cup final, for Albany Northern League second division clubs, four years ago - coincidentally also against Ashington.
That time they had four travelling fans, on Tuesday there were 60 - more, they reckoned, had it not been darts and dommies presentation night in the Social Club.
They fought hard but lost 2-0. Reminiscent of the biblical bit about the physician healing himself, the exercise guru marked defeat by beginning the following day a two month scientifically monitored diet - a "health related fitness programme," he calls it.
He's joined by new assistant manager Andy Turner, another sports heavyweight. The manager weighed in at 18 stones 8lbs, the new guy a straight 18 stones.
"At Leeds Metropolitan University where I did one of my degrees they run something called fat camps. This is the Evenwood fat camp," says Ken.
No stone unturned? Watch this ever decreasing space.
The following evening to the Northumberland Senior Cup final, Newcastle United Reserves v Whitley Bay at St James's Park - like Horden only a bit posher, and with something called a "grey guest ticket" for the directors' box.
A guest was seldom greyer; it's the worry.
Newcastle was 90p a pint more expensive than Horden, too: John Smith's Smooth, £2.35.
The Magpies, in truth, fielded not so much a reserve side as a youth club - no names to trip from the tongue, not even Calvin Zola Makongo, though Marc Walton might well be one for the future.
Said by the natives even to walk like Alan Shearer, he scored both goals in a 2-0 win. Sir Bobby presented the trophy to his boys: they were at home, after all.
Another final thought: the colourful commemorative programme from last Monday's Albany Northern League Cup final - the last programme for a match at Feethams - is still available at 50p from reception at the Echo's head office in Darlington, or for a few bob more by post from this address.
Newcastle United Reserves are also in action tonight - coincidentally at Ashington in a match to benefit tragic two-year-old Kirsty Sawyer, seriously injured in a New Year's Eve hit and run accident which left her sister dead.
Colliers' secretary Brian Robinson is a staff nurse at Wansbeck District Hospital, working alongside the sisters' mother Sharon.
"I was on duty on the night of the accident. There wasn't a soul in Ashington unaffected by what happened," he says.
Sir Bobby Robson has promised as strong a team as possible for the match, which begins at 7pm. The new Craven Cup holders hope for a Portland Park gate of 2,000.
Sticky wickets notwithstanding, Durham's director of cricket Geoff Cook has clearly not lost his sense of humour. His answering machine message begins: "As usual, we're all out at the moment...."
Fifteen years after striding an international stage, former top referees George Courtney and Ken Redfern were back in action on Wednesday night - in the Over 40s League third division cup final, Hylton Castle v Marsden.
It should have been a born-again trio, but George Tyson - another old first division man - pulled out with a groin strain. "I went berserk with him," says George Courtney.
Redfern, 59, ran a line without the tights which became his Football League trademark; Courtney, 61, blew the whistle.
"It was a lovely, old fashioned occasion. I just floated over the ground," he insists.
They were paid in whisky - "just the thing," says George, "for am ageing teetotaller like me."
Another familiar face among the Over 40s, Andy Fothergill - Durham's wicketkeeper in early County championship days - is celebrating premier division promotion with Croft, near Darlington.
Once a familiar Northern League centre-forward, he now keeps goal.
"By all accounts he's had a tremendous season," says League secretary Kip Watson.
A minor counties regular between 1984-91, Andy made 11 first class appearances - sharing the gloves with Chris Scott - in which he claimed 19 victims, but averaged just eight with the bat.
The man with the third most appearances for Darlington (Backtrack, May 6) is the late Brian Henderson - two behind John Peverell's total, though Brian played four more League games.
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