IF there was a prize for consistently failing to tell the truth in Soapland the runaway winner would be Peter Barlow in Coronation Street (ITV1).

Look where this lying has got him - two wives, Shelley the barmaid and Lucy the florist.

For months his favourite phrases were "I promise I'll tell Shelley tonight" and "I promise I'll tell Lucy tonight". He never did, probably because he was too busy with the weddings arrangements. It was only a matter of time before Two Wives Barlow got his comeuppance. As someone who runs a betting shop, he must have known the odds were against him getting away with bigamy. A visit from Lucy to Shelley - and not to deliver a nice bunch of flowers - lets the cat (or rather, the love rat) out of the bag.

You know what they say about a woman scorned. Well, think of the hell-hath-no-fury effect of two similiarly offended women. The pair hatch a plan to have their husband arrested. Another secret love tryst gets closer to being revealed when Katy, the schoolgirl lover of nurse Martin, reveals the identity of her lover to Tyrone, when he says he wants to stop pretending to be her boyfriend.

Roy and Hayley reach the end of their tether, which isn't a very nice place to reach, over pregnant (but is she really?) Tracy's scheming. They tell her if she doesn't talk things over with them, the deal is off and they won't buy her baby. I hope they've got a receipt if they want to return unwanted goods.

Meanwhile Nick (I'm Too Sexy For My Shirt) Tilsley has a shock - the script doesn't require him to display his six-pack. The Soap Accent Police will be questionning him about his voice soon. Lisa is another Soapland returnee who's had a makeover while absent from EastEnders (BBC1). New hairdo, new make-up, new character. She's failed to eliminate Phil Mitchell by shooting him. Now she's using subtler methods to snatch back daughter Louise - smiling mischievously when his back is turned. Alfie is still worrying about Nana Moon's health, unable to admit that she's losing the plot. He's so distracted that he doesn't notice Kat - despite her day-glow sun tan and vivid lipstick - going off on a date with Andy the gangster.

Zoe, the Slater girl who used to think Kat was her sister not her mother, is still hesitant about sleeping with rotten Ronnie. A plan is devised to get her into bed, although confessing he loves her could be a step too far.

Much coming and going in the Square too. Sonia arranges a trip to India, presumably because nobody is paying attention to her now she's a health care worker with no plotline. Dirty Dennis the Second returns, which we can tolerate. Sharon and her quivering lips are back too, but the bad news is that she has the irritating Vicki with her.

In Emmerdale (ITV1), Chris has a present for his unfaithful wife Charity - a suitcase full of her clothes. This is what is known in the soap trade as a subtle hint. He wants her out, after learning of her hanky-panky with Cain, the father of the baby she gave away, but has now reclaimed. Chris has to tell her, after she doesn't get the suitcase hint, that their relationship is over.

Charity tells Debbie (that baby she gave away but has now reclaimed) that she still loves Chris, which causes Cain to go nuts and rush off to Tate Towers, better known as Home Farm, clutching a kitchen knife which he doesn't intend to use, I suspect, for culinary purposes.

Robert is fast developing into a junior Peter Barlow, keeping several woman hanging on his every word. Elaine can't decide whether to sleep with him. Why not ask the public in a phone poll like on Fame Academy?. Donna tells Katie that she's better off with Robert, and then promptly falls into bed with him.