A QUICK straw poll in the pub the other night thankfully revealed that I am not alone in feeling intensely irritated by all the flags flying from car windows at the moment. At first I thought it was something to do with D-day, but then I realised it is meant to be an expression of patriotism ahead of Euro 2004.
So enormous is our anticipation of this competition apparently that the whole country is on tenterhooks wondering whether or not John Terry will be fit for the opening match.
Terry's hamstring has become as famous as Beckham's metatarsal.
Well sorry, but I don't fall for all this hogwash. As we approach the longest day, the evenings are for cricket, croquet, bowls, walking, golf, barbecues, beer gardens, and I really couldn't give a monkey's whether Terry is fit or not.
Does my irritation make me unpatriotic?
Perhaps it does, but it strikes me that all this flag-waving is an ill-conceived marketing ploy aimed at blinkered football fans. It is also deeply insensitive, coming hard on the heels of those wonderful octogenarains returning to the Normandy beaches.
They gave us a reason to be proud, now we can only hope that the efforts to keep football hooligans at home will prevent them from heaping their usual mountain of shame on the country.
Nor do I see much cause for pride in a squad with at least one member whose chief reason for wanting a World Cup winner's medal was that it would prove a "babe magnet."
Sure, I would like England to win Euro 2004, but there was always a much better chance of England winning the Rugby World Cup and we didn't see any flags flying then.
IF Sven's men make an early exit will the same patriots continue to fly their flags for Tim Henman at Wimbledon? Tim will be 30 in September and first-time winners at Wimbledon tend not to be of such advanced years, but obviously he has a chance after his showing in Paris suggested he hasn't peaked yet.
Sportsmen in this country seem to fulfil their potential later than others. Cricketers are blossoming at 27, as with Andrew Strauss and Geraint Jones, while golfers wait until they are 31, as with the two latest European Tour winners.
Scott Drummond and Simon Khan were both previously unknown, and after winning the Volvo PGA at Wentworth, Drummond trotted out the old line: "It has taken me ten years to become an overnight success."
Unfortunately, Drummond used Taylormade's new adjustable driver, the R7, which can be set up to assist a draw or a fade or higher flight. The most skilful golfers adjust their swings to achieve such ends, but shot-making is increasingly being erased by technology, which also makes it possible for a 14-year-old girl to hit the ball 300 yards.
Not that we should allow that to detract from the prodigious talent of Michelle Wie, the 6ft 1in Hawaiian girl who will be the centre of attention in the Curtis Cup at Formby in Lancashire this weekend.
When this event was contested at Ganton, near Scarborough, four years ago it merited four hours of live BBC coverage. This time it is getting none as the Wie attraction is perceived to have less pulling power than certain other events.
It certainly hasn't taken Michelle ten years to become an overnight success, and it will be interesting to see if she differs from typical British starlets, for whom the road to fulfilment is usually strewn with potholes created largely by the fact that get too much too young.
FURTHER evidence that it is nonsense to suggest prizemoney for women's tennis should be the same as for the men was provided by the French Open final between Russian childhood friends, which was all over in 58 minutes.
They used to play for slices of pizza, which would have been a more appropriate reward than the £560,000 at stake at Roland Garros. In recent years there have been boring all-Williams finals then all-Belgian finals, and now an all-Russian affair. What the women's game clearly needs is some variety, but don't be surprised if Venus and Serena rise to the top again at Wimbledon.
WE really should be waving flags for English cricket at the moment. If it hadn't been for Brian Lara's 400 in Antigua, England might have won their last six Test matches and could be looking forward to winning 11 on the trot as a whitewash in the home series against the West Indies must be on the cards.
The New Zealand series has turned out not to be such a well-balanced contest as expected because of England's continued improvement and the Kiwis' injuries.
Their attack has added to the impression that there really aren't very many great bowlers in the world and the rate at which bowlers keep breaking down suggests that the Twenty20 match planned for next year's Ashes series might be the way forward. God forbid!
Comments: Our rules
We want our comments to be a lively and valuable part of our community - a place where readers can debate and engage with the most important local issues. The ability to comment on our stories is a privilege, not a right, however, and that privilege may be withdrawn if it is abused or misused.
Please report any comments that break our rules.
Read the rules hereComments are closed on this article