TIS the season to be merry and full of good cheer (as long as you don't drive).

Even in Soapland people are busy giving each other presents. Take Paul Trueman, he's helping lots of smackheads have a good Christmas by drug-running for Handy Andy the gangster.

But it's not so much a case of rest ye merry gentlemen as arrest ye merry gentlemen with Paul getting grabbed by the long arm of the law in EastEnders (BBC1). They ask him very nicely - by wrapping their truncheons in tinsel and offering him a mince pie to mop up the blood - to co-operate with them and grass up Andy.

This doesn't seem a very good idea, especially as Andy is in a bit of a bad mood after discovering that wife Sam is busy converting the Mitchell assets into hard cash. She needs the money to fund bruver Phil Mitchell's escape from the country. I'm sure some of us would willingly contribute if she'd only ask.

She's sold The Arches to chip shop entrepreneur Ian Beale and, horror of horrors, takes a bagful of fivers from Dirty Den to make him the new owner of the Queen Vic. The knock-on effect of this is that the Moons - Alfie, Nana and Spencer - are thrown out on the street and left looking for an empty stable in which to spend Christmas.

Meanwhile, Paul is finding that the other man's grass is always greener. Andy wants to give him a surprise going away present. It's a surprise because I'm no saint Paul didn't know he was going away. Thoughtful Andy has even bought him something to wear and keep his feet warm - a pair of cement boots. They're the essential fashion accessory for criminals who tell on their boss. Well, it makes a change from leaving Albert Square in the back of a taxi. And people have been known to cheat death when it occurs off-camera. Look at Dirty Den's miraculous return years after being gunned down by a bunch of daffodils.

The spirit of goodwill doesn't seem to have reached Sadie in Emmerdale (ITV1). She's determined to ruin Charity's forthcoming marriage to her elderly father-in-law Tom King. That would put Sadie's nose out of joint by making Charity top dog - well, bitch - of the King clan.

Sadie the wicked lady's plan involves her young lover Robert the randy mechanic who does things with spark plugs that make her eyes light up. She wants to show Tom that Charity's cheating on him, recruiting nasty Cain Dingle, Charity's ex-lover and father of her child, to help her.

Over at the Woolpack, sisters Diane and Val bury the hatchet, although surprising not in each other's head. They've kissed and made up, and are now regaling regulars with endless choruses of Sisters, Sisters, There Were Never Such Devoted Sisters like cut-price Beverley Sisters.

Christmas is coming in Weatherfield too so the build-up to major misery over the period continues in Coronation Street (ITV1). Karen McDonald loses her much-wanted baby but still pretends she's pregnant to wind up Tracy and pay her back for all her "barren Karen" name-calling.

Is there no end to the feud between these two women over Steve, an unlikely romantic piggy in the middle if you ask me?. Apparently not until Boxing Day when all hell breaks loose in Soapland.

We can only hope it leaves Silly Sally's social-climbing plans in ruin. She gets her comeuppance this week at the hands of common old Cilla at the Oakhill fayre. I'd suggest putting Sally in the stocks and throwing rotten tomatoes or rolled-up scripts for Family Affairs at her. That would put her in her place.

Published: 19/12/2004