THE news last week of the shelving, once again, of any upgrading of the A1 through much of North Yorkshire brought no Christmas cheer to those who have to use the road regularly.

Spectator's colleague, who, almost four decades ago, was the reporter assigned to walk the then-unopened stretch of motorway from Scotch Corner northwards to Coatham Mundeville, believed it was the harbinger of a decent road from the North-East to London.

Not so. Such lengths of the A1 now up to motorway standard don't all offer three lanes and North Yorkshire runs Northumberland a close second for the worst trunk road sections.

Cynics among us are now discussing the timing of last week's news, which seeped out rather than being honestly released. Is it - perish the thought - Two Jags' subtle revenge for our rejection of his North-East Assembly? North-Easterners' progress south will still be impeded through an area where his referendum plan never even got off the ground. Two birds, Mr Prescott?

Ho, ho, no

THE Stupidest Christmas Press Release from PR Peoplewith Time on their Hands Prize goes to the Chartered Society of Physiotherapy

"Ho ho ho might be his cry but physios say No No No to Santa's lifestyle," it reads.

"He works in a highly stressful way with long hours, late nights and only sustains himself with a poorly balanced diet of whiskey (sic) and mince pies. He is carrying heavy loads in sacks over his back and with that large belly he clearly has obesity issues."

People get paid money to produce this rubbish.

Yorkshire big heads

YORKSHIRE men are known for their bluntness and for being fairly careful with their pennies but it seems they are also expected to be big-headed.

The search for a replacement for a hat best described as battered and looking as if it's made out of old heather yielded just one (unsuitable) in a small size in a well-known North Yorkshire country supplies store. All the rest were L or even XL. And just when his wife had finally persuaded him to abandon the old heather, too.

Christmas cheer

Spectator's as charitable as the next man but he did think the cheery Help the Aged canvassers were flogging the proverbial dead horse on Darlington's teeming High Row on Tuesday . Their optimistic "Can you spare a minute for charity?" plea was met with almost universal responses of "Sorry", "Not today" and from one harassed shopper, a terse "You must be joking". There's a time and place to be stopped in the street by well-meaning charity volunteers. Four days before Christmas on High Row is not it.