LAST week EastEnders was said to have been hours from the chop because of poor story lines and a ratings slump.
The scriptwriters from one of the nation's favourite television dramas, however, could have done themselves a big favour and tuned in to the soap opera currently running on Tyneside for tips.
Sex scandals, treason, betrayal, avarice, greed, political strife, intrigue and power struggles - they've had the lot.
And with storylines like this promised every week you're guaranteed a full house.
This week's cliffhanger ended with United's very own version of 'Nasty' Nick Cotton - Craig 'bad boy' Bellamy - being driven out of Albert Square, sorry, St James' Park, by new heavy, Graeme Souness.
Bellamy is arguably the most talented player to have played for United in recent years, and it is no coincidence that his arrival on Tyneside coincided with a return to the swashbuckling days of Kevin Keegan's reign.
The controversial Welshman has been Newcastle's best and most committed performer this season, and there is little doubt they will miss the devastating pace and energy which makes the 25-year-old one of the Premiership's top players
It was hard to tell if he was missed on the terraces, however, as the crowd was subdued; aside from some mischievous chants from the away fans of 'where's your Bellamy gone' and a pocket of United fans in the Gallowgate belting out 'Craig Craig Bellamy, tra la la la la'.
In his absence, the Newcastle boss opted to play with Alan Shearer and Shola Ameobi as a twin strike force, with Patrick Kluivert in a withdrawn role just off the front two.
One of Bellamy's strengths is his ability to drop off his marker and work the channels. The ploy pulled players out of position and allowed his team-mates to exploit the holes in behind the defence.
With no one to fill that role it was up to full backs - Celestine Babayaro and Stephen Carr - to exploit the channels vacated by the controversial striker, and they did so with great effect.
Bellamy's absence also provided the enigmatic Kluivert with a chance to be the Magpies' new hero. The Dutchman did not have one of his best games and on another day he could have four or five goals. But there was still enough from the former Barcelona man to suggest he could still have a big say in Newcastle's season.
Ameobi has been very much third and fourth choice striker since he broke through into the first team five years ago, and he is another hoping to stake a claim in Souness's starting XI. He did his chances no harm against Coventry at the weekend, as his goal testified.
He mugged left back Stuart Giddings - with the skill of an professional pick pocket - before a slaloming run and step-over sent centre back Dean Leacock for a newspaper and he rifled the ball into the corner of Luke Steele's net.
New boy Babayaro went one better than his team-mate, if that was possible, seven minutes in to the second half when he stepped past both Richard Duffy and Michael Doyle, swapping the ball from one foot to another and thumping past Steele at his near post.
Tougher tests than Coventry lie ahead for the team and for a manager who has a history of falling out with big names. A trip to Manchester City on Wednesday followed by Charlton's visit to Tyneside next weekend will reveal a clearer picture as to exactly how much they miss Bellamy.
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