When her brother was diagnosed with cancer, Helen Farrar's wedding plans were thrown into disarray. But, as Helen and hew husband Richard tell Women's Editor Lindsay Jennings, they had the fairytale ending they always dreamed of - with a documentary crew filming their special day.

THE moment was perfect and the setting idyllic. Richard Farrar and his girlfriend Helen had had a wonderful time in the Maldives, enjoying the watersports and sunbathing among the beautiful scenery. Now, on their last night, the couple were enjoying a romantic, candle-lit meal together. Gazing up at the stars, they listened to the waves gently lapping against their wooden verandah and chatted about the best parts of their stay. But as Helen enthused about the diving and watersports, Richard had a certain question on his mind.

"I always wanted the moment to be perfect and we'd had such a fantastic holiday," he recalls. "So when I saw that we could have dinner on the verandah on stilts over the sea with the waves lapping, I knew it would be a good place to pop the question. When I asked her she just filled up and said 'yes'."

The couple, who live at Easingwold, near York, set a date of May 7, 2004 for their wedding - almost a year to the day of the marriage proposal. They had met at the Metropolitan Police's training school in London and had remained friends before bumping into each other again at a Christmas CID bash six years later.

"And the rest is history," says Richard, shooting a smile at Helen.

The pair eventually turned their backs on London and moved up to North Yorkshire to be nearer their families. Helen, 32, was stationed at York and Richard, 31, with North Yorkshire Police's Underwater Search Unit.

But as they were excitedly making their wedding plans, they received some devastating news - Helen's brother, Michael Craven, was diagnosed with Burkitt's Lymphoma, a cancer of the lymphatic system. And there was more bad news. It was three months before the wedding, and Michael was not responding to the first round of chemotherapy.

Says Helen: "It was such a stressful time because I was having to drive up to the RVI (Royal Victoria Infirmary) in Newcastle to visit him at the same time as we were planning the wedding. We just had to be positive, otherwise you would give up, and I always believed he would pull through."

Helen had lost her dad, Bill, to cancer when she was only ten years old. She desperately wanted her older brother to be well enough to walk her down the aisle and to be able to fully join in with the festivities. With this in mind, the pair had a tough decision to make.

Says Richard: "It was so hard because we had to decide: do we go ahead with having it in May so he can see his sister get married, or do we postpone it knowing that he may not live? We discussed it with our family and decided to postpone it until whenever he was better - whether that was a year down the line or ten years."

Fortunately, the couple did not have to wait long for some good news. In June they were told that a second bout of chemotherapy was working. With a new date for the wedding of October 3, the wedding plans picked up again.

When Helen's mum, Susan Craven, popped into The Bridal Lounge in Northallerton for her daughter's gown, staff told her of a film crew from Channel 4 who were wanting subjects to take part in a pilot wedding documentary. The couple applied to take part and the production company picked Richard and Helen out of scores of applicants.

Says Richard: "It seemed like a good documentary because it was filming a wedding with a different twist by being through the eyes of the mother. We agreed to do it but we didn't want it to be intrusive because it was our wedding day and you only get one shot at it. We didn't want to be dictated to by the camera crew, but the researcher came and spoke to us and put our minds at ease."

Adds Helen: "I think it was as much of a fairytale wedding for them because we were getting married in some beautiful scenery in Yorkshire."

The forecast for October 3 had promised rain and dark skies, but on the morning of the wedding Helen threw back her curtains to find brilliant sunshine. She arrived at St Stephen's Church, in Aldwark, near Easingwold, in an ivory, off-the-shoulder gown carrying her favourite flowers, lilies. By her side was Michael, who proudly walked her down the aisle. Even more poignantly, Helen's wedding ring had been specially made from gold adapted from her dad's cufflinks.

Says Helen: "It was the most amazing feeling walking into church with everybody there, to see the church full with all our family and friends and seeing your husband-to-be at the altar. I normally don't like being the centre of attention, but I absolutely loved it."

Afterwards, the couple enjoyed a wonderful reception at the Aldwark Manor Hotel, near Alne, York. The whole day had been perfect. All the venues had let the couple keep their deposits and St Stephen's Church had even moved their Sunday service to accommodate them. The camera crew, who had interviewed the family in the lead up to the wedding, kept their promise, and discreetly filmed on the big day, a relief to both Richard and Helen.

"I had visions of them walking around with these great big booms for the sound," laughs Richard. "But they just had a hand-held camera and looked like anyone else who might have been filming. They were brilliant."

For their honeymoon, the pair jetted off to Bali and Hong Kong - and were even upgraded to first class. Now they are looking forward to the documentary being aired - and they're expecting a bit of teasing from their work colleagues.

"We're bracing ourselves for when it comes out because we can't remember what we said," says Richard. "But for me, it was the best day of my life, marrying the woman of my dreams and having all my friends and family there to share in it."

Helen agrees. "It was a perfect day - it was definitely worth waiting for."

* My Daughter's Wedding airs on February 21 at 2.45pm on Channel 4.

Published: 14/02/2005