At Your Service: As it's foretold

Whoever it was that first advised against working with children and animals had clearly never been a bishop in the Church of England, especially on Palm Sunday.

Its scriptural centrality notwithstanding, the Bishop of Ripon and Leeds had wisely decided against travelling with a donkey, though images of the dear old thing were to bray away during his sermon.

"The donkey," said the Rt Rev John Packer, "plays a large part in the Christian imagination."

Children were more here and now: 14 were to be confirmed - hands-on experience - at St Giles's church in Bowes, including quads Emma, Kirsty, Laura and Rebecca Guy, who'd mark their twelfth birthdays five days later.

"It is a great privilege to be here," said Bishop Packer, his first visit to one of the northernmost outposts of his vast diocese, and looked like he clearly meant it.

The column, conversely, was there on condition - quads' law - that the locally famous foursome should not overshadow their peers and nor, of course, should they.

"They're lovely girls but just regarded as normal around here," said memorably named churchwarden Betty Ettey, whose own grand daughter was among the other candidates.

Bowes is just off the A66 in Teesdale, perhaps best known for the ruined 12th century castle next to the part-Norman church and as the supposed home of the school - and of the Jimmy Edwards schoolmaster - which inspired Dickens to write of Dotheboys Hall and Wackford Squeers.

Once it was in North Yorkshire, now - though south of the river - in Co Durham. In the Conqueror's day they'd probably have fought pitched battles over it, Bowes and arrows.

Church and churchyard also commemorate Roger Wrightson, who died of a fever in 1714, and Martha Railton, his lover, who while tolling the bell at his funeral declared that her heart was broken and herself died a few hours later.

They were buried side by side. Martha, said the register, had "expired purely thro' love." Both were "around" 20.

There are two fonts, medieval and possibly Roman, other Roman remains from the nearby fort of Lavatris and in the lady chapel boards gilt inscribed with the names of donors, around 1900, to the Bowes Living Augmentation Fund.

The Bishop of Ripon's "million shilling fund" had coughed by 50 bob, leaving his Lordship still with a few shillings in the episcopal coffers.

Sunday evening's service was led by the Rev John Moore, retired chaplain of Barnard Castle School, still living in that Durham diocesan town but helping out across the water in the absence of a vicar. They worry if they'll ever get another.

In 1974, Mr Moore recalled, the then Bishop of Ripon had urged his priests to guard their northern boundaries, as if fearing border raids from the Land of the Prince Bishops.

Now they're indebted to retired Durham priests like Mr Moore and to the Ven Derek Hodgson, a former Archdeacon of both Auckland and Durham, for keeping services going in the parish.

"They've been absolutely wonderful," said Andrew Bracewell, the other churchwarden.

Canon Hodgson had also written a piece in the parish magazine. "There is a saying about Christians, especially Church of England Christians, that we all welcome change so long as it doesn't make any difference."

Before the service, Mr Moore has also enjoined against "photography and whatnot". Whilst it was possible to slip a note to the late arriving, camera bagging colleague, whatnot may have been rather more difficult to regulate.

The church was thronged, like Bowes show field on a sunny September Saturday, the young confirmation candidates - almost all girls - required to make some pretty grown up promises, a sort of spiritual three Rs.

They must reject the devil and all rebellion against God, renounce the deceit and corruption of evil, repent of the sins that separate from God and neighbour and turn, of course, to Christ.

On such occasions it is usually impossible not to recall the last Bishop of Durham's joke about the best way of getting rid of bats from the church roof - "Confirm them; you'll never see them again."

It won't happen to these young folk, of course.

Bishop Packer talked of both belief and legend concerning donkeys, confirmed the candidates in pairs, administered their first Holy Communion, laughed a lot.

"The Holy Spirit doesn't come to boss us around," he said, "He comes to encourage us and to help us."

There were palm crosses, too, a couple of the younger bairns using them for a little impromptu sword play thereafter. Cut and thrust notwithstanding, it probably wasn't the intention.

Afterwards there were photographs, much merriment and possibly even a little whatnot, followed by a bun fight in the village hall. It was a good night, to be confirmed.

* The Bishops of Ripon and Leeds and of Knaresbrough host a day in Ripon Cathedral on Saturday, April 9 for all those confirmed in the diocese in 2004 and so far in 2005.