JUST like the BBC researcher who recently offered the long dead Bob Marley the chance of an interview, we all make mistakes.
Most of the comeback kids who agreed to take part in Hit Me Baby One More Time (ITV1, Saturday) for a start. That's if you've heard of them in the first place.
"Who the hell is Tiffany, wasn't she in EastEnders?" said my wife who obviously couldn't remember the singer's one real hit called I Think We're Alone Now from 1987.
The fact that the US Tiffany is just five years older than the UK's soap Tiffany (Martine McCutcheon) is probably why she won the vote over such wrinkled luminaries as Gloria Gaynor, Howard Jones and Limahl.
Why you would want to hit the comeback trail at 33 years of age is another matter.
Tonight's programme, which is being beamed from a BBC studio because of a strike by ITV technical staff, should see Shakin' Stevens emerge victorious... and last month he released The Collection CD just to remind us of his past glories.
Celebrity Stars In Their Eyes (ITV, Saturday) was on even shakier ground. "I suppose he does sound a little bit like Elvis," said my more confident musical guru as Jerry Springer dressed up in the famous powder blue suit and shades to rather uncertainly warble I Can't Help Falling In Love With You.
The audience didn't reciprocate the feeling and the actress Vickie Gates duly won. Vickie who? some might say.
Pushing back the boundaries of fame even further, she appeared as the singer Maria McKee, who would have most of us scrambling for the Internet to name her one and only hit.
She reached No 1 in the UK with Show Me Heaven thanks to it being included in Tom Cruise movie Top Gun.
The actress sang the song beautifully and dropped a big hint about seeking a future in musicals. Well she has been spectacularly axed from The Bill as Marilyn Chambers in the van filled with petrol ramming Sun Hill police station storyline.
Possibly the idea of marrying Reg Hollis was too much for her.
What never goes away is the never-ending supply of reality TV. The ever-expanding Sue Beeny was back with Property Ladder (C4, Tuesday) with my wife giving strict instructions that it was to be taped along with Supernanny (C4 Tuesday). "Sue Beeny's just had a baby, that's why she's so big," she explained as the bustier than usual blonde struggled to cope with first-time Essex developer Sue Silver who refused to listen to any advice.
It hardly came as a surprise to learn that Ms Beeny's subject failed to live up to her surname in terms of earnings.
The words "supernanny's gonna fail" uttered by a plump over-excited boy set the scene for Jo Frost's bid to break the destructive, swearing, spitting, hitting habits of four children in Northampton. The term "vicious cycle" could have been invented for the Collins family and jokes about setting up a naughty area in our house abounded.
Perhaps that's the place we need in celebrity land for those who behave badly... although Ozzie Osbourne would never be able to leave.
Published: 09/04/2005
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