Grand Designs (C4); Make Me Beautiful, Please (ITV1): "SO what are you going to build?," asked Kevin McCloud. "A mono-dimensional contemporary space of a light and airy nature," replied DIY house builder Monty.

The presenter of Grand Designs wasn't fooled for a minute. "Yes, but what's it going to be?," he insisted. "A bungalow," said Monty.

Even by the crazy standards of Grand Designs, Monty and partner Claire's proposed house was an extraordinary and risky venture. They couldn't afford a property in London so they bought a piece of land. It may only have cost £40,000 but wasn't the most sensible size or shape for a house, being a narrow strip of urban wasteland sandwiched between two houses.

Monty's design reflected this. "Creative thinking" is how he put it. And thinking dictated by planners insisting on a single-storey building with no windows on either side because of neighbouring properties. Monty got round this by installing a massive sliding glass roof on his experimental house. "Move over Thunderbird One," said McCloud on seeing this remarkable moving roof. Finance was a problem too. No bank or building society would give him a mortgage, so he had to borrow £110,000 from his father, who remortgaged his house to obtain the cash.

The joy of Grand Designs is watching people attempt the seemingly impossible. If the unexpected happens - and here, it included the arrival of building inspectors and Claire getting pregnant - so much the better. Coming in the same week as All New Cosmetic Surgery Live, ITV1's latest makeover show looked pretty tame. The five show aims straight for the jugular, being unashamedly exploitative and outrageous. Make Me Beautiful, Please tried to make out it was performing a public service. But not before subjecting 100 women, chosen from 2,000 applicants, to Pop Idol-style auditions. They spoke of what they wanted changing and why, as well as parading before the judges in their underwear.

Three contestants were selected to go to America for a total body, face, fitness and lifestyle transformation. The game show aspect was reinforced as the narrator was careful to add up exactly how much all the treatment was going to cost. At £38,000, Bernadette was the winner.

The emotional cost was high too. There was plenty of crying, not so much from pain after surgery but because the women were required to leave their families behind in England for six weeks. After going under the knife, they were treated by health and fitness gurus. They were supplied with specially prepared meals, although they cheated with pizzas and doughnuts.

What the women needed as much as physical improvement was a confidence boost. Faye hated her nose, Carol worried that she looked older than she was, and Bernie wanted to get rid of her "apron", the excess skin around her stomach after weight loss. I couldn't help thinking the money would have been better spent on psychiatric rather than surgical help.

Published: 14/04/2005