Time and money

It made me think that perhaps it IS fair that women, in general, live longer than men – they need the extra time to do the extra stuff.

Here's another example. I divide my morning into five five-minute blocks: shower, dry, brush teeth, get changed and eat breakfast. So my morning routine takes half an hour max. My hair is 'styled' in seconds – easy when your hairstyle is scruffy anyway. As long as I don't look as terrible as I did when I first awoke, I'm happy.

My girlfriend, on the other hand, has make-up, hair drying, hair straightening, conditioning, moisturising to do.

And it isn't just time that women spend more than men on – it's also money.

Most men's wash bag consists of shaving stuff, hair stuff, deodorant, shower gel and maybe aftershave Women have all kinds of expensive stuff. Foundation, concealer, brushes, scissors – as well as a whole range of stuff which wouldn't look out of place in that final torture scene in Braveheart.

Most women have long hair – meaning they use lots of shampoo and conditioner every time they wash their hair.

The cost of this adds up. Decent hair straighteners can cost over £100 – they are basically small irons.

Little jars of foundation powder can cost £20. It's coloured dust – and even then, it's generally a pretty dusty colour. If it's that expensive, at least make it fluorescent.

It doesn't seem to matter if men have blotchy, uneven skin – or the flipside of this is that most men would attract some fairly strange looks if their blotchy uneven skin was covered up with Boots' best foundation, concealer et al.

Then there's the cost of a night out. Boys can get away with a pair of their old jeans and shirt. Girls, however, seem to need new 'tops' every week. When out, a pint of beer is one of the cheaper alcoholic drinks in the pub, while a G&T or a glass of wine is likely to cost more.

All this considered, I won't stop moaning when I'm waiting for my girlfriend to get ready.