Teesside man says cat saved his life after suicide attempt

Six years ago, the Middlesbrough man was midway through an attempt to end his own life when the timely intervention by his beloved cat, Archie, made him think again.

The DJ and social media expert is forever changed by his brush with suicide and he’s desperate to drag others back from the brink.

Read more: Survivors speak of dark days after thousands in the North East die from suicide

He spoke to Echo investigations editor Joanna Morris in the hope his story would let others know there is hope to be found – even on the darkest of days.

'It's tunnel vision'

“I was in such a black place, I thought nothing would go right ever again and I didn’t know how to get out of it,” he said.

“The best option, if I’d been thinking straight, would have been to talk to my friends, family, anyone.

“But in that moment, you are not thinking straight. I’d had enough, I wanted to sleep and never wake up again.

“People might think it’s selfish but it’s tunnel vision, it’s frightening.”

Joel and Archie

At the height of his career as a DJ, Joel became tormented by anxiety, suffering regularly with repetitive, invasive thoughts and struggling with his mental health.

Within months of his mental health crisis beginning, he moved to London and took up roles behind the scenes in TV production, working on shows including Sunday Brunch and Loose Women.

His professional life was a success but personally, Joel was battling – drinking too much, harbouring obsessive thoughts, sabotaging relationships, on and off anti-depressants. Eventually, he suffered a nervous breakdown.

A court case – sparked in no small part by Joel’s poor mental health – went against him, putting his career in jeopardy and sending him spiralling towards suicide.

He said: “I thought nobody cared, that nobody was there but I did have something, the cat.

“That night I suddenly thought, who’s going to feed him? And it was in that moment things changed.”

Mr Young is now hoping to inspire more understanding and to urge others to spot the signs of suicidal thoughts in their own loved ones, especially those who may appear fine on the surface.

“I hadn’t been fine for a long time,” he said, “for years, there had been peaks and troughs of depression.

“But people saw me as successful, saw me making jokes – but that was my way of coping, trying to be funny.”

Some people believe suicide is something that could never happen to them, he said: “They say they’d never do something like that but you just do not know.

“I thought I would never top myself and I only stopped because of my cat.”

He believes men especially struggle to open up, lack the ‘mental language’ to express their troubles without shame and worry about becoming a burden to their loved ones.

But help is out there for those who do manage to break the silence, he said.

“When it all came out, I was surprised by the amount of support I had, some of it from people I barely even knew.

“They want to be there, your friends would rather go to you when you’re having a scary time than go to your funeral.”

Mr Young, who still lives with his life-saving cat, says he is proof there is hope after suicidal thoughts.

Middlesbrough man Joel Young. 45, with his life-saving cat, Archie, 7.

“A few days after, I picked myself up and started letting people help me.

“People came and they listened.”

To the friends and family of those who may be suicidal, he says understanding, listening and trying to help, even in the smallest of ways, is key to helping someone.

And he would urge those considering taking their own lives to find a moment of clarity within the darkness and seize on it to reach out.

“There will be a point where you will experience a moment of self-awareness, when you realise you’re not thinking quite right.

“That is the time to reach out, whether it’s to professional organisations, your doctor or your friends and family.”

“People talk about fear of missing out, FOMO,” he adds as a final point, “but this could be FOME – fear of missing everything.

“Whether it’s your first pint after work, your next gig, the best sex of your life, whatever makes you happy, you’ll miss out on all of it.

“Step away from the embarrassment, from being scared and you’ll find there is always someone there to help, even if it’s a complete stranger.”

If you are in need of support you can contact the following:

- Samaritans are available, day or night, 365 days of the year. You can call them for free on 116 123, email them at jo@samaritans.org, or visit www.samaritans.org to find your nearest branch.

- If U Care Share on 0191 387 5661 or text IUCS to 85258

- SANE on 07984 967 708, Calm on 0800 58 58 58

- Tees, Esk and Wear Valleys NHS Foundation Trust crisis line 0800 0516 171.

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