Christine Ohuruogu believes some critics will never allow her to move on from missing three out-of-competition drugs tests.
The new 400 metres world champion had only just returned from a one-year ban for the missed tests when she triumphed in Osaka last week, but her success was marred by critics harking back to the events which led to her suspension.
The 23-year-old east Londoner will compete in the Golden League meeting in Zurich tonight, and is still waiting to discover whether the British Olympic Association - who ban all athletes who transgress the strict rules on drug testing from future Games - will decide her case is exceptional enough to allow her to race in Beijing.
For now Ohuruogu is just trying to blank out the negative reaction to her Japanese success, but she admits it is something that may follow her around for the rest of her career.
Asked what life had been like since her triumph in Japan, she said: ''I'll be honest - very up and down. I'm going to have to deal with it if I want to run.
''I think I'm beginning to realise that nobody is ever going to draw a line - people will hang on to what they believe no matter what.
''I'll do my best to change that, but I don't think it's ever going to fully work.
''I think I've dealt well with the year I've been through and I think if I can do that, I think I can pretty much get through anything.
''I'm not saying it's going to be easy but I know when the time comes I'll deal with it, I'm a fighter.''
Ohoruogu admitted returning from Japan to her Newham home had been a low-key affair - but definitely not because it was tainted by her ban.
Last year's Commonwealth gold medallist said: ''I've not really been out, I've just been trying to keep a low profile because obviously I'm still racing.
''I just want to keep focused on finishing the rest of my season.
''I've not seen anyone, I've just kept my head down. It's been a quick turnaround, I've had to come home, sort myself out and leave again.
''There has not been much time to go out and meet people. I'll celebrate later on.''
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