IF Ryan Sidebottom plays for England today it will end the family stigma of father and son both being one-cap wonders, but it is impossible to imagine that the long-haired left-armer will earn many more.

At 29 his second cap will come six years after his first and his shock selection is surely a throwback to the days when England drafted in bowlers like Neil Mallender, Mike Smith and Martin Bicknell especially to take advantage of swinging conditions at Headingley.

Mallender, now on the panel of elite umpires, did extremely well by taking five for 50 against Pakistan but was selected for only one more Test, while Smith did not feature again and Bicknell's four caps were spread over ten years.

Sidebottom junior took one wicket in each innings on his England debut but suffered an injury, while his father, Arnie, went into his only Test with a sore toe and tried to alleviate the pain by bowling with a big hole in the front of his boot. On realising this, it is reported that the chairman of selectors, Alec Bedser, used words along the lines of "stupid wazzock."

The ball no longer swings as lavishly as it did at Headingley, which makes Sidebottom's call-up all the more surprising as he has not been a regular nudger of selectors since his move to Nottinghamshire, who have a more prolific curly top in the lanky Cornishman, Charlie Shreck.

It is a sad state of affairs when, rather than concentrating on bringing on young talent, the selectors consider it necessary to make a one-off appointment in order to achieve a victory against such a hapless West Indies team.

As with Owais Shah, who filled in until Michael Vaughan was deemed fit, Sidebottom is merely deputising for another Yorkshireman Matthew Hoggard, whose injury was intially described as a thigh strain. It has since transpired that the strain is in the adductor muscle, which is somewhere between the groin and the stomach and takes longer to heal.

A STRAINED adductor muscle is one of the multitude of injuries suffered by Jonny Wilkinson while adding a mere four caps to his tally since winning the World Cup four years ago. He now faces two Tests in what, by his own admission, is the most physically intimidating environment of all.

He is expected to be fit for the first meeting with South Africa tomorrow after being laid low by a stomach bug, which is hopefully a mere coincidence after he was forced to pull out of the first Test in Pretoria in 2000 an hour before kick-off with food poisoning.

The All Blacks suffered the same affliction prior to the 1995 World Cup final in Johannesburg, prompting accusations of chicanery and in a country known for its excellent cuisine it does seem odd that the problem should crop up again.

If they haven't already targeted Wilkinson, the South Africans will doubtless do so on the field. But he is determined to meet the challenge head-on and he needs to come through these two games to build confidence ahead of the next meeting between the sides, at the World Cup in France in September.

HAVING recorded in this space my astonishment at the appointment of Kevin Shine as England's bowling coach, I now wonder where he stands following the announcement that Allan Donald is to help during the third and fourth Tests and in the one-day series which follows. This is said to be a trial, so if Donald passes it by persuading Steve Harmison to bowl straight it will cast Shine in a predictably poor light.

WHILE Newcastle United fans fondly remember the influence of Sir John Hall, supporters of the other sports he brought under his Sporting Club umbrella will not recall his efforts with quite the same affection. He was responsible for uprooting the highly successful Durham Wasps ice hockey team from their Durham City base, and while his acquisition of Rob Andrew led to Newcastle winning rugby's Premiership title in 1998 he subsequently left the Falcons in the lurch. Or was his son, the dreadful Douglas, responsible?