A WOMAN who says she was raped as a little girl told a court she broke her silence after two decades because she could not keep it to herself anymore.
The woman says she was sexually abused and raped by Mark Stanford when she was aged about seven and nine.
She told the trial at Teesside Crown Court yesterday that she had self-harmed and suffered flashbacks since the incidents.
Then in December 2005, after becoming upset about something else, she told her mother about the abuse she suffered and was persuaded to inform the police.
"I couldn't keep it to myself anymore," she said. "I knew I had to say something."
Mr Stanford, 32, was a teenager at the time of the alleged assaults which occurred in the Darlington and South Durham areas.
Mr Stanford, of Overden Way, Halifax, denies three charges of indecent assault and two of rape.
Giving evidence from behind a screen, the alleged victim told the court she had not fully understood what happened to her at the time. She said that on two occasions, in the late 1980s, Mr Stanford put his hand inside her underwear and touched her.
The court was told that after the second incident he went on to rape her. She also told the court that in the early 1990s Stanford had again indecently assaulted her, forcing her to perform a sex act him and perform oral sex before raping her.
Until breaking down to her mother 18 months ago, the victim said she had only told one other person - a former partner - about the incidents, but told him she did not want to involve the police.
Sophie Drake, defending, asked the woman why she had not told her family about the incidents when they happened.
She said: "I wanted to talk to my mam, I wanted to see her.
"I didn't know how to, I felt dirty, I felt it was my fault."
Miss Drake said that details the woman described to the court had not been included in a statement made to police.
The alleged victim denied making details up to sound plausible and said: "I am just remembering things that happened."
When she was accused of making up the allegations, she replied: "I do not think I would go through all of this if I was lying."
The trial continues.
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