ACROSS the aisle from me, a bemused, and obviously bored, grandmother is told off for texting on her mobile. In the next seat, her granddaughter is openly videoing sections on hers unchallenged. That just about sums up the quirky appeal of Nikelodeon’s animated underwater hero, who has been brought to life by Consett’s Chris Coxon, sounding like Joe Pasquale after he’s inhaled from a helium-filled balloon.

For most of the second half, Coxon is floating around on wires, as Spongebob achieves his dream of “flying” with the jellyfish. It’s the result of Spongebob accidentally inflating his famous pants with a hairdryer – no mean feat under the sea.

Younger ones are just pleased to see a colourful collection of characters, vaguely resembling the tenyear- old TV show cast, cavorting around the stage.

One suspects that the PC brigade has robbed the tour of any real suggestion of amusing slapstick, but there is plenty of music and song.

Applause is a more confused than convincing from the moment Andy Peart introduces the storyline from Bikini Bottom as Patchy the Pirate, as well as throwing in the baddie voices of Plankton and The Flying Dutchman.

Charles Brunton makes a convincing Squidward while John Fricker (Patrick Star) and Martin Johnston (Mr Krabs) win the biggest costume contest.

Not enough sound carries into the circle, and some grandmas may have seen that as a blessing. But you certainly can’t burst Sunderland Empire’s bubble after booking this debut tour, which even America hasn’t seen yet.

■ Until Sunday. Box Office: 0844-847-2499 SunderlandEmpire.org.uk