A NEW York Winter’s Tale has too many elements competing for our attention, and none of them gel. The titanic battle between angels and demons sits awkwardly with the rose-tinted central romance.

Colin Farrell is unremarkable in an undernourished lead role, but he does catalyse a handsome screen pairing with Brown Findlay.

Russell Crowe’s accent is a treat, becoming as thick as mud without warning in pivotal scenes.

Finding one word to succinctly sum up this disjointed mess seems unlikely, but as director Akiva Goldsman’s film teaches us, the secrets of the universe twinkle in plain sight.