By Issy Crocker

MAKING mistakes privately is not too bad a thing.

You may feel a bit embarrassed or disappointed, but can often rectify the error with no one else any the wiser.

If you are one of those people with very high standards, you may also get on your back about missing the mark, and that can be very debilitating.

I know that from half a lifetime of self criticism.

But what if the mistake could become public, with one or many aware of your failings?

What are your options then? One is to do an ostrich and put your head in the sand and rear in the air, and hope that if you don’t notice, no one else will. I did that once as a young clerical assistant when I spilt duplicator ink on the floor.

Finding nothing but paper to wipe it with, making even more mess, I was too embarrassed and ashamed to own up, so I left it, assuming someone else would clear it up, and no one would know it was me. Of course, that didn’t work, and I was soon summoned to the director’s office. I left more ashamed and somewhat humbled, having learned a vital lesson in personal responsibility.

Another option is to look around for the most likely person to blame, convincing yourself that you were not at fault at all. Now I often find this one coming to mind – happened again recently, when I was heading to Manchester to deliver a training course, when I should have been heading to Swindon. But, fortunately, wisdom prevailed and I gathered the data and saw that it was indeed my own error.

We all know that the only honest thing to do is to recognise reality, apologise for any harm done, and do what can be done both to rectify the error for now, and also to learn from it for the future.

Even so, I find myself wrestling with my pride or my ego, so wanting to look good, until I remember that people prefer me to be human, and that that comes if I take a breath and tell the truth.

Ironically, once I’ve wrestled my ego to the floor, I relax.

How about you?

■ Issy Crocker and team are a personal effectiveness training and coaching organisation based in Darlington.

Visit issycrocker. co. uk for details.